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Love, A for ever Topic

Hello, everyone!

 

As the title says, love is a for ever topic.

 

I would like you guys talk about your favorite poems about love and share them with us.

 

Also, it is best that you write a poem about love. I will give the first try.

 

Welcome to come here!

 

This is a poem (if it can be called a poem, haha )written in the midnight when I was suffering from insomnia on May, 17th.

 

漫漫长夜,无心入眠。I can't fall asleep in the boundless night,
朝起夕斜,又是流年。Sun rises and falls as time goes by.
日日一复,谁问可怜?Life is repeated everyday, who cares me?
愁若水逝,何似人间!Sadnesses floats like water, so called heaven in the earth.

 

Is this a poem about love?

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先分享半首

無題/李商隱

昨夜星辰昨夜風,畫樓西畔桂堂東.

身無彩鳳雙飛翼,心有靈犀一點通.

Farewell last night, last night of wind and of starlight!

To the west, your Painted Bower, to the east, my Cassia Hall...

Although on Wings of Phoenix we'll never reunite,

With Sacred Unicorn throb our two hearts in thrall.

Tr. Feng Xiang

这是你的翻译吗?

譯者是最下方那個英文名字. 我很喜歡他的第一句. 後面似乎譯得不怎麼樣. 但我還是忘塵莫及...

 

同感。第一句的后半句真好。

最后一句才是难度!

Part 1

Everyone has their own translation style just as in writing an essay.  However, it is more difficult because you are trying to guess the feelings of the author.  Although the author and translator can be the one and the same person, it is best to give a literal one, a polished one and if perhaps have more time, a interpretive one.  These are the steps I take when I translate.  First of all, it helps me to expand my vocabulary and see how the source language is used.  The polishing part hones your command of the target language and your interpretive one shows how much you understand the culture of the source and target languages.

 

So here goes my attempt. :)

 

1st line = original, 2 line: literal 3rd line: polished 4th line(if any) interpretive

 

漫漫长夜,无心入眠。I can't fall asleep in the boundless night,

Unrestrained long night, no heart enter sleep.

Long is the night and my heart wished no sleep.

 

朝起夕斜,又是流年。Sun rises and falls as time goes by.

Morning up (vertically), evening slant, again flowing years.

Morning rises, evening sets, merely flowing years.

Morning comes, evening goes, another year passes by.

 

Part 3

日日一复,谁问可怜?Life is repeated everyday, who cares me?

everyday once more return, who ask pity

Each day repeats but who will pity me?

 

愁若水逝,何似人间!Sadnesses floats like water, so called heaven in the earth.

Sadness like water dying/pass away, how like human world.

Sadness like passing water, just like the mortal world.

Sadness is like water flowing away, just like death in the mortal world.

Part 4

The crux of your poem comes from the last two lines.  From what I read in the original, Sadness is like life, they will one day be dead ie gone, just like people live and die in the world.  Although at a first glance, it conveys sentiment of sorrows but actually hope in the end.  When sadness dies and is gone, what left is happiness.  So renewed hope.  In this case, a great use of paraprosdokian.  http://www.italki.com/notebook/entry/165500.htm

 

Sorry I have to it 4 parts because Italki has some bug problem!

Where's the 2nd half?  Try to complete it too :)  I shall help you.  It's difficult.

 

昨夜星辰昨夜風,Last night's constellations, last night's wind,

畫樓西畔桂堂東。In the painted walls, west of the Osmanthus Hall...
身無綵鳳雙飛翼,Alas, I have no wings of the phoenix brilliance,

心有靈犀一點通。However our hearts are linked like the threads in the rhinocerous horn.

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