How do you think children must be brought up under the strict control of parents or in freedom?
i think there is no totally strict or totally freedom .So it is better combine both factors to teach childrens .
Well, I remember I saw a documentary about royal families in history and they analysed how the children were raised. Usually the education of the firstborn was very strict since he would eventually become the king. In most cases this education brought terrible consequences, though not in all cases. But I remember one case in particular where the firstborn died in an accident and the second son took his place in the kingship. He had had a different education, less strict and he was an excellent king.
In my dad's family, they were very strict, so my father decided to do the opposite, when we turned 12 years old, he gave us the keys of the house and we could go out and come back any time we wanted and we did not have to answer for what we did, though we had to face the consequences of our acts.
When my brother was 13 years old, he asked my dad: "when will you allow me to smoke?", my dad replied "have I ever told you not to smoke?", my brother asked "Can I smoke?" my father said "you can do it, but you have to be aware that it is not good for you". My brother said that he wanted to smoke. My dad bought him a cigarette and gave it to him... my brother smoked two or three puffs and threw the cigarette away. He said "there is nothing nice about it" and he never smoked again in his life. I was allowed to drink alcohol if I wanted at home. But I never really did it. I started drinking alcohol after I was 24 and I only drunk ocassionally. Today I don't drink alcohol at all. I was allow to smoke when I was 12, but I did not do it until I was 29, and I don't smoke any more.
I think the main idea is that instead of raising children with the idea of "I cannot do this because my dad says I cannot", the children should be able to see "I can do this, but if I do it I will have consequences that could be negative". Parents' decisions should not be the reason why kids do not do things. They should be able to see the reason why it is wrong to do certain things. If you give them the right to decide, they will make mistakes, but they will also see you as the person that gave them the power to decide and will share with you their experience and you will be able to guide them. If they see you as the person who forbids them to do things they will be trying to hide from you the things that they want to do.
I could be wrong, but that I what I think.
there is a fundamental.. when child is at the age of 1to 8 years give too much love and care.. when children is of the age from 9- 15 be on strict on them.. scold then for bad things and mistakes.. this will help them in long run and make them good human being.. and from 16 you should be his friend.. treat like his friend...
@ Mario. You're father is awesome and very intelligent. You're really lucky to have such an intelligent father.
Nice option, Mario!! It would be great, if everything were as merely.
I think no one enjoy smoking at first time and everyone knows that smoking is bad for their health. Nevertheless, people smoke.
it seems to me, Der Terminator, that it's not only for the sake of a theme. You sincere believe that parents should forbid until their children grow up and become sensible, don't you?
It's a big lure to bring up kids in freedom, however, we can't allow them to fall down bitterly.
Why not? For me you were quite convincing.
Any way, thanks for holding discussion.
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