By creating an account, you agree to our terms of service.
What would you say when you want to refuse an invitation to the cinema with an opposite sex who surely knows that you are really free and interested in that movie?
I have no idea.
If I good understood this situation. You don't want to go to cinema with the person X, but you have free time and you are interested in to see movie. And the worst is that the person X know about your free time.Am I right?
If I'm right, you should be honest. Sey to person X that you aren't interested in to spend time with him.
I suggest you still tell him that you'll have no time to go to the cinema with him. Telling him an obvious lie would make him know for SURE that you don't want to be his girlfriend or something.
If that man knows everything about why you are not going to see a movie with him , you might tell him the truth : "I have some company with me" . Most importantly , you have to tell him you are not interested to be with him .
I would say, "It's not you, It's me. I need my time", well, that is not exactly what you need to say in that situation, yet you can just say that you don't feel well or that you are busy with personal stuff... or not interested in going out. Or you could try to tell to that person that you need to invite your friends because you don't go anywhere without them... :P
I would just say, "Thank you but, no thank you." You can even go as far to say, "I promised someone else to see that movie with them." Even if that someone else is just you, alone.
I think Adi gave a great answer. All one needs is one of several possible,
dismissive expressions which communicate to the person that you are not interested in him.
Perhaps one such expression might go something like this.
"I do not think you and I are compatible."
"I prefer my friends to have a relaxed and congenial manner,
and this seems to be missing from our conversations."
"You know, I was intending to go see that movie, but I would prefer to see it with a friend."
At this juncture, you can learn a lot about the man. If he begins asking questions about the identity
of the other person, he is being rude, aggressive, and asking questions which he has no right to ask.
If this is the case, you can remind him of his failure to present himself as a "relaxed and congenial" companion. You can remind him that he brings tension to your conversations that is not pleasant for you and that would be why you prefer not to "keep company" with him.
Always keep in mind your own "boundary". The time in your life is your own, not his.Neither do you owe another person an explanation as to what you do with your time.
With a clear understanding about what is yours in life, and "not his," your communication with others will become very clear.
You can also offer a kind and conciliatory remark which is very friendly and courteous.
You can ask if he has thought of asking another person to go to the movie with him.
This is another test for him. If you get an answer something like; "But I don't want to go with someone else. I want to go with YOU!" Then you will know that the person is highly controlling and manipulative, and not the best choice for a friend. Real friends are neither controlling or manipulative, but ...well, friendly, relaxed, and congenial, fully accepting of your choices in life.
If I were you...I would rather watch that movie alone or with close friends that you feel comfortable with, rather than a stranger that you already know that you will dislike or disapprove. Make a white lie saying that you have change of plan, just to avoid being involved with him.
I would just be straight forwarded just to get him off your hair. Some men can't take no for an answer. Either decline in a polite way or cuss at him if he cross the line...Sounds like he is a stalker if he knows you are available kinda creepy.