I watched the other day the film "My Fair Lady" online and was amazed to see that Colonel Pickering calls Prof Henry Higgins just by his surname. And so does the professor to him. Such as the lines: "Pickering, why can't a woman be more like a man?" & "Higgins, I'm trying to tell you that I want to call off the bet."
They seem to be personal friends, therefore, they are supposed to be on first name term with each other, aren't they? Why do they call each other by surname? This seems a bit strange to me.
This question actually reminds me of a past experience. A long time ago, I translated a script for a Chinese scriptwriter, who emmigrated to the States. In our email correspondance, she always wrote in English and addressed me only by my surname, without even a Mr, which made me feel quite uncomfortable. She is supposed to know how to address people properly in English, as she lived in the States for more than a decade and she wrote the script in English by herself. Language should not be a problem for her. I was wondering why she insisted on addressing me in such a manner? I'd take it as a sort of rudeness and lack of respect.
Here comes my question: can we address people only by using his/her surname without a title? Is this acutally done in an English-speaking country?
As far as I know, we should always address someone, especially someone we do know personally or not so well in a business/social contact, by using a polite salutation address, such as Mr (to a man), Mrs (to a married woman - actually Mrs should be used along with the surname of her husband), Ms(to woman whose marrital status is unknown) or Miss(to an unmarried woman) plus his/her family name. I remember overhearing a quarrel between a client and one of my former bosses, in which the client shouted at my former boss hysterically by calling his surname. He really made a scene in the office. They used to be on very close term with each other and they were often seen drinking up together in pubs after work. However, due to some financial problems, they broke up in the end. Hence the scene I oversaw.
Therefore, calling someone by his/her surname seems to me something unpleasant, which we should avoid during daily contact with people.
Am I right with this?
To Emily: thank you so much for your explanations! appreciated!
In the U.S. it is sometimes done among friends in a semi-joking manner. Sometimes the last names are shortened as a sort of nickname (e.g. someone with the last name Sullivan becomes "Sully," someone with the last name Fitzgerald becomes "Fitzy"). There is no disrespect at all in this, and in some ways it even signifies that you are part of the "in" crowd.
If there are two friends or co-workers with the same first name, it is also fairly common to call them by their last names.
However, if you use someone's last name without their title and you don't know them well/at all, it would certainly be seen as a sign of disrespect. In fact, I knew someone who specifically called his co-worker by the co-worker's last name as a way to express that he didn't like the guy.
I should add that this is almost exclusively done by men. I don't think I've ever heard a woman call another woman by her surname only, unless in one of the examples Sarah gave like in the military or on a sports team.
All the men at my high school called each other by last name which my sister always thought was really funny. Everyone at my school was on friendly terms with each other - there were no distinct social groups and calling each by last name was considered friendly, although close friends always used first names.
It would be awkward if someone I didn't see every day called my by last name though. I think it would sound really condescending or aggressive.
It's a difficult question. I think in your example, the characters were addressing each other in a quasi-formal way (ie. surname but without the title), which was acceptable in that context. Perhaps it's a bit archaic now.
I recall at primary school, one teacher banned us from referring to each other by surname. Even now, only good friends can call me by my surname. If a stranger uses only my surname, it sounds very aggressive (seriously, I'd be expecting that person to punch me).
I don't think this is something you can learn accurately from secondhand information (ie, books, films). We call people by how they introduce themselves. If we're not sure, we just ask.
This is just an Australian perspective, but I'd be interested to hear if there are other opinions.
Yes, you are absolutely correct. To address someone by their surname, without a title, is rude and insulting nowadays. Your translation colleague was wrong to do so.
In the past this was not the case. 'My Fair Lady' is set in a previous era, when it was acceptable for men of the same social status to address each other by their surnames. This originates from the custom in all-male schools and in the military services to call males by their surnames. The fact that Higgins and Pickering are speaking to each other in this way actually indicates that they are friends and equals. At that time it was a mark of friendship - as if they were classmates or army colleagues. A stranger, or a person of a higher or lower social rank, would put Mr or Professor - or whatever their title might be - before their surname. In the past, an employer would also address a servant or a low-ranking member of staff by his surname as an indication of his own higher social status.
