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My Class Poem

*For this poem our teacher explained to us that we had to make an inanimate object come to life, I wrote this poem right after I had read an amazing poem by a classmate who is super talented, his poem really moved me and I was really sad, anyways this is what I wrote right after"

The Faint Glow of Man

The ashes remain motionless.
The color gray suits them, lifeless but somehow alive,
The wind suddenly meets my cheeks and the ashes come to life
They move along with the wind as one.

The ashes form a mysterious figure, I am unable to speak
I try to describe what I am seeing but I am paralyzed, and then...
I hear something, an animal, no... a man.
I can see; an old man who can barely speak.

The man seems a bit weak, almost as if he's ready to disappear
He opens his mouth softly; his voice comes out as a faint whisper
"I once stood upon you, I recall not who I was, and all I am is nothing.
Memory. Recognition. Future. All I lack.

I can't move, the old man has somehow control of me,
Light strikes upon his face; he smiles faintly and remembers something as he speaks again
"I shall not be remembered, I shall be forgotten, and all troubles are gone.
Remember me not; tears shall not be shattered.

Neither evil neither benevolent, merely someone.
Refused to do harm, refused to assist.
Invisible, without goals or dream, anyone.
Never did anything of recognition, fated to be forgotten, better than hatred.
Unintrested, lacking, invisible,
Colorless, insignificant,
Empty.

The old man disappeared along with the wind,
He shall not be forgotten for he has saved me from the same cruel destiny,
He whom never did anything...
Saved me.

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    Corrections

    My Class Poem

    *For this poem our teacher explained to us that we had to make an inanimate object come to life, I wrote this poem right after I had read an amazing poem by a classmate who is super talented, his poem really moved me and I was really sad, anyways this is what I wrote right after"

    The Faint Glow of Man

    The ashes remain motionless.
    The color gray suits them, lifeless but somehow alive,
    The wind suddenly meets my cheeks and the ashes come to life
    They move along with the wind as one.

    The ashes form a mysterious figure, I am unable to speak
    I try to describe what I am seeing but I am paralyzed, and then...
    I hear something, an animal, no... a man.
    I can see an old man who can barely speak.

    The man seems a bit weak, almost as if he's ready to disappear
    He opens his mouth softly; his voice comes out as a faint whisper
    "I once stood upon you, I recall not who I was, and all I am is nothing.
    Memory. Recognition. Future. All I lack.

    I can't move, the old man has somehow control of me,
    Light strikes upon his face; he smiles faintly and remembers something as he speaks again
    "I shall not be remembered, I shall be forgotten, and all troubles are gone.
    Remember me not; tears should not be shed.

    Neither evil nor benevolent, merely someone.
    Refusing to do harm, refusing to assist.
    Invisible, without goals or dream, anyone.
    Never did anything of recognition, fated to be forgotten, better than having been hated.
    Uninteresting, lacking, invisible,
    Colorless, insignificant,
    Empty.

    The old man disappeared along with the wind,
    He shall not be forgotten, for he has saved me from the same cruel destiny (fate?),
    He whom never did anything...
    Saved me.

     

    -Hauntingly beautiful.  How many people believe they will be forgotten when in fact they could have changed the course of so many lives for the better, unknowingly?  Because of your poem I will write a few letters to past friends and acquaintances who have positively impacted my life.  I should remind people of their significance to me, because it may not be as readily apparent as I previsouly believed.  Thank you for the posting, I hope you don't mind the small changes I recommended. 

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