2013.2.18

2013.2.18

I don't know how to explain my feeling now; maybe I lost. I know what I want but the life seems  too realistic, and nobody can understand me. Everyone including my parents don't believe that I can make my dream come true. They just tell me that to be realistic. I don't think that dreams are merely dreams because in my opinion, dreams are the motive force that makes us advance. In a word, I will never give up. Just follow your dream!

Your essay is written with much passion!  There were a few ideas that were unclear.  My apologies if I changed your meaning incorrectly.  Please let me know if my suggestions were helpul.  One easy thing to correct is the spacing after all punctuation marks. 

Hello Ivy:

 Let's give it a look, shall we?

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2013.2.18

I don't konw how to explain my feelings now.   Maybe I  am  lost.

I know what I want but  life is real,  and nobody can understand me.

Everyone including my parents don't believe that I can let my dream come true.

They just tell me that to be real.

I don't think that dreams are merely dreams,  because in my opinion dreams are the motive force for  making an advance.

In a word,  I will never give up.  Just do yourself! [Just be yourself?]

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   Generally,  a good essay Ivy.   Keep writing.  Are you studying any songs yet?

---Warm Regards,  Bruce