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I don't know how to explain my feeling now; maybe I lost. I know what I want but the life seems too realistic, and nobody can understand me. Everyone including my parents don't believe that I can make my dream come true. They just tell me that to be realistic. I don't think that dreams are merely dreams because in my opinion, dreams are the motive force that makes us advance. In a word, I will never give up. Just follow your dream!
Your essay is written with much passion! There were a few ideas that were unclear. My apologies if I changed your meaning incorrectly. Please let me know if my suggestions were helpul. One easy thing to correct is the spacing after all punctuation marks.
Let's give it a look, shall we?
I don't konw how to explain my feelings now. Maybe I am lost.
I know what I want but life is real, and nobody can understand me.
Everyone including my parents don't believe that I can let my dream come true.
They just tell me that to be real.
I don't think that dreams are merely dreams, because in my opinion dreams are the motive force for making an advance.
In a word, I will never give up. Just do yourself! [Just be yourself?]
Generally, a good essay Ivy. Keep writing. Are you studying any songs yet?
---Warm Regards, Bruce
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