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(31) I truly want to get my writing skills better. I'd love for your help!

 

1)
After returning home from the workout, I was so weary that I zonked out as soon as I lay down in bed. The next morning.... the sun was rising. Sunlight flooded into every corner of my room through a slit in the curtains. The light made my eyes open. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and yawned. I was about to sit up in bed, but my body felt quite strange. It was stiff! Every movement caused sharp pain on my muscles. It was certain that all the muscles were tense. I knew this would happen! It came as no surprise to me since I had overdone the new workout. My brother looked at me and playfully poked me here and there. Today, going to the gym didn't seem to make a sense.

2)
After returning home from the workout, I was so tired that I zonked out as soon as I lay down on the bed. The next day. The sun began to rise in the morning. Sunlight flooded in my room through the curtains. The sunlight woke me up. I wiped the sleep out from my eyes and yawned. I was about to get up in the bed, but my body didn't respond well. It was stiff! I felt like I was hit by a ton of bricks. I was certain I was having the post-workout muscle aches. I knew this would happen! I surely had pushed myself further than I would normally do on my first day. My brother laughed at me and poked me here and there. I couldn't see myself going to the gym today.

Please help me.
Thanks!

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    (31) I really truly want to improve get my writing skills better. I'd love for your help!

    This sounds more natural.

    1)
    After returning home from the workout, I was so weary that I zonked out as soon as I lay down in bed. The next morning, the sun was rising. Sunlight flooded into every corner of my room through a slit in the curtains. (Beautiful sentence!) The light made my eyes open. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and yawned. I was about to sit up in bed, but my body felt quite strange. It was stiff! Every movement caused sharp pain on my muscles. It I was certain that all the muscles were tense. (Because this story is in an informal tone, saying "it was certain" sounds too formal and awkward.) I knew this would happen! It came as no surprise to me since I had overdone the new workout. My brother looked at me and playfully poked me here and there. Today, going to the gym didn't doesn't seem to make a sense.

    2)
    After returning home from the workout, I was so tired that I zonked out as soon as I lay down on the bed. The next day. The sun began to rise in the morning. Sunlight flooded in my room through the curtains. The sunlight woke me up. I wiped the sleep out from of my eyes and yawned. I was about to get up in the bed, but my body didn't respond well. It was stiff! I felt like I was hit by a ton of bricks. I was certain I was having the post-workout muscle aches. I knew this would happen! I Surely I had pushed myself further than I would normally do on my first day. My brother laughed at me and poked me here and there. I couldn't see myself going to the gym today.

    Please help me.
    Thanks!

     

    Really great! I can honestly say that you can write at a higher level than some Americans. :) Keep up the good work!

    (31) I truly would want to get my writing skills bcome better. I'd love for to have your help!

    1)
    After returning home from the workout, I was so weary that I zonked out as soon as I lay down laid in bed. The next morning,.... The sun was rising. sunlight came flooding into every corner of my room through a slit in the curtains. The light It made my eyes open. I rubbed the sleep out of my eyes and yawned. I was about to sit up in the bed, but my body felt quite strange. It was stiff! Every movement caused sharp pain on my muscles. It was certain that All the muscles were tense. I knew this would happen! It came as No surprise to me here since I was too ambitious in my yesterday's workout. had  overdone the new workout. My brother looked at me and playfully poked me all over. here and there. Today, Going to the gym today didn't seem to make any sense.

    2)
    After returning home from the workout, I was so tired that I zonked out as soon as I lay down laid on the bed. The next day. The sun began to rise in the morning. Sunlight flooded into my room through the curtains the next morning and . The sunlight woke me up. I wiped the sleep out from My eyes opened to the unwelcome intrusion.  and yawned. Just as I was about to get up in from the bed, but my body did not respond well. It was all stiff! I felt like I was hit by a ton of bricks. I was certain that I was having suffering from the post-workout muscle aches syndrome. I knew this would happen! I surely had pushed myself further than I should would normally do on my first day. My brother laughed at me, and poked poking me here and there. I couldn't see myself going to the gym today.

    Please help me.
    Thanks!

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