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The Story of China

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    The Story of China

    There might be no China in the world. I am not crazy. This is based on a book called "Historical Records" of China.

    Why is China called "China"? There are many answers. One of them is that it has nothing to do with fragile and delicate china. Its origin is a Latin word: 'Sina', which is also the name of a popular website in China. "Sina" was a name used by westerners to address an oriental power, Qin, in Mandarin, reigning over China from 221 BC to 207 BC. During the Spring and Autumn Period and Warring States Period, when dozens of kingdoms emerged and went to chaotic wars to take control of more land, the Sina Kingdom gradually grew and became one of the strongest of all.

    In the late Warring States Period, in the Zhao Kingdom, there was a businessman called Lyu Buwei. At that time, merchant industry was discouraged because all the authorities believed that farming was more helpful to the economic development, so merchants were disrespected and usually poor. But Lyu Buwei did not care. He had the ambition to buy a prince and reap a kingdom!

    When the Zhao Kingdom and Sina agreed on a cessation of war, they sent their respective princes to each other as hostages. But soon afterwards, they went to conflicts again. At the beginning of the hostilities, the Zhao Kingdom decided to cancel all the wages of the Sino prince, Zichu, while still watching him. The prince knew that the war would inevitably break out and the Zhao Kingdom would kill him as a punishment for Sina. This, however, was interpreted as a golden opportunity to Lyu Buwei.

    Lyu invited the prince to his home for meals often and gave him financial aid in order to make friends with him. One day, when the prince was eating in Lyu's home, he was interested in a dancer of Lyu's, who had been bought by Lyu, used as his sex slave and had just been pregnant. He asked Lyu for the girl and the request was accepted. When the war was about to break out, Lyu invited both the prince and the soldier who was sent to watch the prince to a meal. He intoxicated the soldier, and suggested the prince to escape to his own kingdom and aided him in the attempt. The prince appreciated all of Lyu's help and generosity so much that he promised that when he rose to the throne, he would hire Lyu as his prime minister.

    Within only twelve months after the pregnant girl was given to the prince, in Sina, she gave birth to a son, who later merged all of the other kingdoms and awarded himself the title, the First Emperor. The prince was then made the king of the kingdom and honoured his promise to Lyu. Soon after that, the new king passed away because of excessive alcohol and sex. The late king's son, i.e. the First Emperor, was made the new king. But obviously, he was too young to rule the kingdom. Therefore, Lyu was the real ruler of the kingdom.

    The mother of the king was respected because of her marriage. On the other hand, she had to remain a widow and never marry another man according to the tradition of the monarchy. Unfortunately, she was too young and sex-hungry to obey the principle. She missed her former master, Lyu, and called him for secret adultery. Lyu, fearing the power of her, had to obey. But as the First Emperor grew increasingly older, Lyu also began to worry that this would eventually be revealed, and the punishment he was to face was death.

    In the last resort, Lyu ordered his men to find a sexy young man. They found one, called Laoai, with an enormous organ. Lyu made the man to perform some obscene act in the public to show off how big his organ was and made the news known to the mother of the king, who was very satisfied with the organ. Then they announced that the man was castrated and sent him to the mother of the king to serve her as a eunuch. However, he was not really castrated and was used as her sex slave. She took advantage of her power to award Laoai a high rank and moved to another place out of the palace, where she secretly gave birth to a number of children.

    However, the First Emperor was but also an ambitious king. He had long hated Lyu because Lyu prevented him from being the real ruler of the kingdom. When he found out what his mother had been doing, he decided to take this opportunity to regain power from Lyu. He sent troops to arrest his mother and Laoai, killed Laoai and his half-siblings, massacred Laoai's relatives and friends, and expelled his mother from the palace. Then he judged that Prime Minister Lyu would be suspended from his position for conspiracy in this case. He gave a piece of land to Lyu and ordered him to leave the capital city. Gradually, he reduced Lyu's power and eventually forced him to commit suicide.

    When the First Emperor triumphed for the first time in his career, he did not know that he had just killed his biological father, as is implied by "Historical Records". When we talk about China, we are talking about the descendant of the Sina Empire. A king of Sina was based his legitimacy on his genuine blood relation with the monarchic ancestor. That is to say, when the son of Lyu was crowned, Sina's land was taken over by Lyu's son and no longer legitimately belonged to Sina. Thus, there is no China now.

    All in all, this is the father of the First Emperor and the empire, a dishonest merchant. This is the mother, a sex slave, who was sold and bought as a commodity, who did not even have a name, and who was became a scheming bitch. This is their son, who was the emperor of Sina Lyuna.

    You might think this is ridiculously uncyclopedic, but it is actually completely in accordance with the authoritative "Historical Records" of China.

     

    [Very good - and very interesting.  It was the opinion of the satarist Jonathan Swift that much of the English nobility had actually been fathered by servants and stable hands.]

    The Story of China

    There might be no China in the world. I am not crazy. This is based on a book called "Historical Records" of China.

    Why is China called "China"? There are many answers. One of them is: it has nothing to do with fragile and delicate china. Its origin is a Latin word: Sina, which is also the name of a popular website in China. "Sina" was a name used by westerners to address an oriental power, Qin in Mandarin, reigning over China from 221 BC to 207 BC. During the Spring and Autumn Period and Warring States Period, when dozens of kingdoms emerged and went to chaotic wars to take control of more land, the Sina Kingdom gradually grew and became one of the strongest of all.

    In the late Warring States Period, in the Zhao Kingdom, there was a businessman called Lyu Buwei. At that time, merchant industry was discouraged because all the authorities believed that farming was more helpful to the economic development, so merchants were disrespected and usually poor. But Lyu Buwei did not care. He had the ambition to buy a prince and reap a kingdom!

    When the Zhao Kingdom and Sina agreed on a cease of war, they sent their respective princes to each other as hostages. But soon afterwards, they went to conflicts again. At the beginning of the hostile, the Zhao Kingdom decided to cancel all the wage of the Sino prince, Zichu, while keeping on watching him. The prince knew that the war would inevitably break out and the Zhao Kingdom would kill him as a punishment to Sina. This, however, was interpreted as a golden opportunity to Lyu Buwei.

    Lyu invited the prince to his home for meals often and gave him financial aids in order to make friends with him. One day, when the prince was eating in Lyu's home, he was interested in a dancer of Lyu's, who had been bought by Lyu, used as his sex slave and had just been pregnant. He asked Lyu for the girl and the request was accepted. When the war was about to break out, Lyu invited both the prince and the soldier who was sent to watch the prince to a meal. He intoxicated the soldier, and suggested and supported the prince to escape to his own kingdom. The prince appreciated all of Lyu's help and generosity so much that he promised that when he rose to the throne, he would hire Lyu as his prime minister.

    Within only twelve months after the pregnant girl was given to the prince, in Sina, she gave birth to a son, who later merged all of the other kingdoms and awarded himself the title, the First Emperor. The prince was then made the king of the kingdom and honoured his promise to Lyu. Soon later, the new king passed away because of excessive alcohol and sex. The late king's son, i.e. the First Emperor was made the new king. But obviously, he was too young to rule the kingdom. Therefore, Lyu was the real ruler of the kingdom.

    The mother of the king was respected because of her marriage. On the other hand, she had to remain a widow and never marry another man according to the tradition of the monarchy. Unfortunately, she was too young and sex-thirsty to obey the principle. She missed her former master, Lyu, and called him for secret adultery. Lyu, fearing the power of her, had to obey. But as the First Emperor grew increasingly older, Lyu also began to worry that this would eventually be revealed, and the punishment he was to face was death.

    In the last resort, Lyu ordered his men to find a sexy young man. They found one, called Laoai, with an enormous organ. Lyu made the man to perform some dirty act in the public to show off how big his organ was and made the news known to the mother of the king, who was very satisfied with the organ. Then they announced that the man was castrated and sent him to the mother of the king to serve her as a eunuch. However, he was not really castrated and was used as her sex slave. She took advantage of her power to award Laoai a high rank and moved to another place out of the palace, where she secretly gave birth to a number of children.

    The First Emperor was but also an ambitious king. He had long hated Lyu because Lyu prevented him from being the real ruler of the kingdom. When he got to know what his mother had been doing, he decided to take this opportunity to regain power from Lyu. He sent troops to arrest his mother and Laoai, killed Laoai and his half-siblings, massacred Laoai's relatives and friends, and expelled his mother from the palace. Then he judged that Prime Minister Lyu was suspended from his position for conspiracy in this case. He gave a piece of land to Lyu and ordered him to leave the capital city. Gradually, he reduced Lyu's power and eventually forced him to commit suicide.

    When the First Emperor triumphed for the first time in his career, he did not know that he had just killed his biological father, as is implied by "Historical Records". When we talk about China, we are talking about the descendant of the Sina Empire. A king of Sina was based on his genuine blood relation with the monarchic ancestor. That is to say, when the son of Lyu was crowned, Sina's land was taken over by Lyu's son and no longer legitimately belonged to Sina. Thus, there is no China now.

    All in all, this is the father of the First Emperor and the empire, a dishonest merchant. This is the mother, a sex slave, who was sold and bought as a commodity, who did not even have a name, and who was later a bitch. This is their son, who was the emperor of Sina Lyuna.

    You might think this is ridiculous uncyclopedia, but it is actually completely in accordance with the authoritative "Historical Records" of China.

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