Translating 'Memory' into Chinese

I like the song named <Memory> very much. I have translated the song into Chinese. There may be some mistakes in my translation. My friends from italki , can you please correct them for me(only Chinese) please? Thank you very much.

Do this and do that sounds very aggresive to native speakers. It's more like a command than a request.

Memory（记忆） Also my favourite.

Try to visualise it. Don't just translate word by word.

midnight /午夜
not a sound from the pavement /人行道上寂静无声
has the moon lost her memory? /月亮女神仿佛失去了记忆
she is smiling alone /在孤独地微笑
in the lamplight /无力的灯光下
the withered leaves collect at my feet /脚边涌来了枯黄的树叶
and the wind begins to moan /秋风开始了呻吟

memory /回忆
all alone in the moonlight /月光下唯一的伴侣
i can smile at the old days /那令我微笑的过去
I was beautiful then /我曾美丽的时光
i remember /我还记得
the time i knew what happiness was /我那是所享受的幸福
let the memory live again /让我的记忆重现

every street lamp /每一盏街灯
seems to beat /好像都奏出
a fatalistic warning /宿命的警告
someone mutters /低声的抱怨
and a street lamp gutters /忽明忽暗的街灯
and soon it will be morning /早晨即将来临

。。。

touch me /抚摸我吧！

为什么是爱我？角色是一只猫，猫总是希望人们去抚摸她。
it\'s so easy to leave me /你转瞬就会消失
all alone with my memory /随之逝去的是我的记忆
of my days in the sun /那些阳光下的日子
if you touch me /如果你抚摸我
you\'ll understand what happiness is /你就会懂得是幸福的真谛
look a new day has begun/看那，新的一天已经到来

Translating <Memory> into Chinese

I like the song named <Memory> very much. I have translated the song into Chinese. Maybe my translation has some mistakes. My friends from italki , correct them for me（only Chinese）, please! Thank you very much.

Memory（记忆）

You are translating by meaning and conjecture.  A very dangerous method especially for poetry and lyrics.  Mine is in blue and reflects more accurately.  This is from a modern setting and thus cannot use some of the older terms in literary Chinese.  Also I did not take into the entire context to polish my Chinese.  I'm sure you can do better than me at this.  At least after what you had misinterpreted.

midnight /午夜
not a sound from the pavement /人行道上是如此的寂静 铺面上聲音全無走道/便道 不適合因為沒有石屎含意

has the moon lost her memory? /月亮女神是否失去了她的记忆 月亮是否忘了她記憶, 英文只指月亮, 用拟人法描写, 沒提什么女神. 
she is smiling alone /她孤独地在微笑  
in the lamplight /在灯光里                  孤孤独独地在街灯微笑 这兩句应該不能分來翻譯. Lamplight 指旧时用煤气的街灯
the withered leaves collect at my feet /枯萎的树叶聚集我的脚边
and the wind begins to moan /秋风开始了呻吟 风儿开始呻吟 句中与劇中沒有指什么时節

memory /记忆
all alone in the moonlight /是月光下的孤独   孤独在月光中 这兩句也要翻譯成為一句
i can smile at the old days /我能微笑地面对往日的时光 我微笑往日
life was beautiful then /生命是如此的美丽 当时生命可良
i remember /我记得
the time i knew what happiness was /那过去快乐的美好时光 当时快乐是什么
let the memory live again /让我的记忆重现 让记忆重活

every street lamp /每一盏街灯
seems to beat /好像都被打碎 都打出
a fatalistic warning /是宿命的警告 宿命的警告
someone mutters /有人在低声地抱怨 有人喃喃自語关於
and a street lamp gutters /街灯在风中摇曳 街灯辺的水溝
and soon it will be morning /早晨即将来临 不过 /日出/辰早/快至

daylight /黎明
i must wait for the sunrise /我必须等待太阳的升起
i must think of a new life /我必须考虑新的生活 我定要思量一个新生活
and i mustn't give in /我绝不屈服 我不可让步
when the dawn comes /当黎明来临的时候
tonight will be a memory too /今夜将要成为记忆 今夜也成记忆
and a new day will begin /新的一天将要开始 新日重始

burnt out ends of smoky days /燃尽烟雾弥漫的日子
the stale cold smell of morning /干冷的夜晚已感知到早晨  寒冷旧臭的凌辰
the street lamp dies /街灯正在熄灭       街灯灭絕
another night is over /又一个夜晚过去   一夜又完
another day is dawning /新的一天已经来临 改日重出

touch me /爱我 觸我  这的的確確要他触摸她.  唱者是隻猫!
it\'s so easy to leave me /又这样轻易地离我而去
all alone with my memory /只孤独地留下我的记忆 與我陽光日子的记忆同孤

of my days in the sun /在阳光下的日子里 这句要同上句一起翻譯
if you touch me /如果你爱我 如果你触摸我
you\'ll understand what happiness is /你就会懂得什么是快乐
look a new day has begun/开始寻找新的一天 看看! 新日重演了

I say good job but there are nuances that you missed.  Also you need to know the background story in order to provide a more accurate translation.  And yes, a very beautiful and moving song. One of my favourites.