letter of application Dear Ms Evans, I recently saw your advertisement in the Tourist Information Office. Consequently, I would like to apply for the position of tourist guide. Firstly, I have been

Jesus

letter of application Dear Ms Evans, I recently saw your advertisement in the Tourist Information Office. Consequently, I would like to apply for the position of tourist guide. Firstly, I have been studying English for many years, so I have gained the appropriate skills to communicate perfectly in that language. Furthermore, I have already had some experience of this kind of work, so I have a good knowledge of dealing with people. Naturally, I know my city very well because I have been living here all my life, so I could show to the visitors the most important monuments and sights. Overall, I feel I would be suitable for the job, so I enclose a copy of my curriculum vitae, which will give you more details of my career. I look forward to hearing from you. Yours sincerely, Jorge Martin.

Oct 24, 2014 7:29 PM

Corrections · 3

Jesus,

You did a good job with the letter. I thought there was an overuse of the word "so" to connect ideas. Here is a modified version of what you wrote for your consideration. See what you think.

Tony

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Dear Ms Evans,
I am responding to your advertisement in the Tourist Information Office and would like to apply for the position of tourist guide.
I have been studying English for many years and have gained the appropriate skills to communicate fluently in that language.
Furthermore, I have had previous experience in this kind of work, and I also have a good knowledge of dealing with people.
Naturally I know my city very well because I have lived here all my life. As a result, I am thorouhly familar with the most important monuments and sights which tourists would like to visit.
Overall I am certain that I would do an excellent job for your agency, and I am enclosing a copy of my curriculum vitae for your consideration.
I look forward to hearing from you.
Yours sincerely,
Jorge Martin.

October 24, 2014

Jesus ... I think your English is quite good ... however, what I think you might want to work on is making it more interesting. You need to paint a picture of why you're the person who can give tourists an experience of a lifetime. If this is truly a job you would like to have, your issue is marketing, not English. Open with something that makes Ms. Evans want to read more ... a story ... a startling fact ... a revealing experience from your previous guide work. Here are just some ideas ... One day while leading a group of people through .... , a woman said to me ... Did you know that the one thing that excites most of the people I've led on tours is .... There is a legend from the ancient village of .... that says ... Play with this ... make it yours but make it fun for the person who receives this letter. That will help her know that you can make the tours fun for the people you guide. Good luck!

October 28, 2014

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