Yap Jun Hong
Lege, hjelp meg "Lege, lege! Jeg er i smerte" Espen må bli i mye smerte, fordi mindre det er arvolig, Nordmenn sjelden gå på lege. "Roe ned. Hva heter du og hvordan kan Jeg hjelp deg?" Sier Legen mens han tok en penn "Jeg er Espen. Min nese, hals, øyner, alle vondt!" Svarte Espen mens han gikk på stol og satte seg. "Ok. La oss se hva er feil..." Men etter ti minutten med stønnet, legen forstatt vet ikke hva var feil. "Espen, Unnskyld, men Jeg hjelp ikke du". "Ah, min leg?" stønnet Espen. Igjen, legen vet ikke hva var feil. Plutselig, se hvordan Espen skalvt, han hadde en ideen. "Espen, hvar er din familie?" "I Poland. Jeg har ikke sett dem i fem år..." "Espen. Kropp din er fin. Men din hjerte er ikke fin. Du er hjemlengsel. Gå hjem, Espen, på Poland." Espen nikket, armer rykninger, og venstre. "Doctor, doctor! I am in pain!" Espen must be in a lot of pain, because unless its serious, a norwegian would never see a doctor. "Calm down. Who are you and how can I help?" the doctor asked as he picked up a pen. "I am Espen. My nose, throat, eyes, all of it hurts!" replied Espen as he took a seat. "Ok. Let us see what is wrong..." But after 10 minutes filled with groaning, the doctor did not know what was wrong. "Espen, I'm sorry but I can't help you." "Ah, my leg?" groaned Espen. Again, the doctor did not know what was wrong. Suddenly, looking at the way Espen shook, he had an idea. "Espen, where is your family?" "In Poland. I haven't seen them in 5 years." "Espen, your body is fine. Your heart is not. You are homesick. Go home, Espen, to Poland." Espen nodded, arms shaking, and left. (I wanted to practise writing about body parts, but I couldn't find a good excuse to write all of it out and I just started writing another short story. While it did secure what I had learnt before (in 'Bussen'), a lot of the grammar here is quite advanced and escapes my grasp. I do apologise and thank you in advance for reading through it all and helping me correct it. :) )
Oct 31, 2014 8:24 PM
Corrections · 2
1

<em>Note the differences in the sentence structure in Norwegian when it comes to dependent clauses. "(...) med mindre det er alvorlig, GÅR nordmenn (not "nordmenn går) (...). I don't know if you've covered this in your Norwegian lessons yet. True fact about Norwegians rarely visiting the doctor by the way, at least when it comes to my family.</em>

(Lege) Doktor, hjelp meg

"(Lege, lege) Doktor, doktor! Jeg er i smerte"

Espen må bli i ha mye smerte, fordi med mindre det er arvoligalvorlig, går Nordmenn nordmenn (with a small "m") sjelden gå på til lege.

"Roe (deg) ned. Hva heter du og hvordan kan Jjeg hjelpe deg?" Sier spurte Llegen mens han tok fant frem en penn

"Jeg er/Jeg heter Espen. Jeg har så vondt i Min nesenesa, halsen, øynerøynene, alle vondt!" Svarte svarte Espen mens han gikk  på stol og idet han satte seg.

"Ok. La oss se hva som er feil..."

Men etter ti minuttenminutter med stønnetjamring/ynking, visste legen forstatt vet ikke hva som var feil.

"Espen, Unnskyld, men Jeg hjelp ikke du Beklager/Unnskyld Espen, men jeg kan ikke hjelpe deg".

"Ah, min leg (hva med) leggen min (da)?" stønnet Espen.

Igjen, Nok en gang visste ikke legen vet ikke hva som var feil. Plutselig, se så han hvordan Espen skalvt, fikk han hadde en ideen.

"Espen, hvar hvor er din familie/familien din?"

"I Poland Polen. Jeg har ikke sett dem i på* fem år..."

"Espen, Kkroppen din er helt fin. Men dinditt hjerte/hjertet ditt er ikke fin** Problemet er i hjertet. Du erhar hjemlengsel. Gå hjem, Espen, til PolandPolen."

Espen nikket, med skjelvende armer, og gikk., armer rykninger, og venstre(<-- as opposed to "right" hand side).

(I wanted to practise writing about body parts, but I couldn't find a good excuse to write all of it out and I just started writing another short story. While it did secure what I had learnt before (in 'Bussen'), a lot of the grammar here is quite advanced and escapes my grasp. I do apologise and thank you in advance for reading through it all and helping me correct it. :) )

* I remember that last time I corrected your notebook entry, I said that when you use "for" in English, you can often use "i" in Norwegian. Well, this is among the exceptions. "Jeg har ikke sett dem PÅ fem år." 
** I think it sounds off to say "men hjertet ditt er ikke fint" because that would either indicate that "your heart isn't nice" or "you're suffering from a heart disease" or something. 

October 31, 2014
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