Lillian
The impact of information explosion Nowadays,it's convenient for us to obtain information through newspapers,websites and television and so on. However,the information explosion bring both positive and negative impact in our life. On the one hand,more information devote to broadening our vision in knowing all over the world's news.On the other hand,when we drop into the explosion of information,it becomes hard to choose the real important information for us.What's worse,we may can't concentrate on what we do because of so much information around us. To avoid being distracted by irrelevant information,I think that we should pay more time reading books so that we would have our own opinions towards to different information,then,we will not lost in variety of information.
Nov 19, 2014 11:28 AM
Corrections · 4
1

The impact of information explosion

Nowadays, it's convenient for us to obtain information through <em>(what you wrote is not wrong English, but it is better to make the media the subject, I feel)</em> newspapers, websites and television <em>(however 'nowadays' doesn't really apply to 'newspapers or TV since they have been around quite a while)</em> and so on make it so convenient for us to obtain information. However, the information explosion <em>(you haven't introduced the term, nor tied it to the media you listed)</em> bring both positive and negative impact in our life.
On the one hand, more information devote allows/helps us to broadening our vision in by informing us about knowing news from all over the world's news. On the other hand, when we drop into are caught up in the explosion of information, it becomes hard to choose/know/identify the what is really important information for us. What's worse, we may perhaps can't concentrate/focus on what we do are supposed to be doing because of so much information around us. 

<em>It is good to try to express negatives in positive form, using some antonym eg 'lose focus' or 'become distracted' rather than 'perhaps cannot concentrate'): eg '</em><em>Moreover the overload of information can distract us from our real tasks.'</em>
To avoid being distracted by irrelevant information, I think that we should pay spend more time reading books, so that we would have can form our own opinions towards to about different information. Then, we will not get lost in variety over-abundance of information.

 

<em>Punctuation:  a space follows punctuation to separate the following word.  The em-dash and left bracket are just a little different however</em> - <em>if you see what I mean (</em>grins)

 

November 19, 2014
Actually,it's the practice prepared for College English Test band 6......so many errors.
November 22, 2014
good job.
November 20, 2014
Want to progress faster?
Join this learning community and try out free exercises!