Carlos Suárez
Steroids Alberto began to go to the gym because he wanted to make his body stronger. At the beginning, he took it easy and practised twice or three times a week, just for fun. At some point he asked to another user of the gym what he did to have such a nice body. This man told him about some harmless substances(steroids), which could help him strengthen his body very quickly. Little by little, Alberto began to take these substances and to go to the gym everyday. Some time later, he would go to the gym on a daily basis, and spent two hours there. He was very happy because his body were very much to his liking, and to everyone else´s. He was buying more and more substances until he got to spend his salary on them. However, he was so obssessed with his training, that he didn't realize that his life was an absolute mess. However, one morning he felt terribly ill and went to the hospital. There he was told that he had a very serious liver problem. If he had gone to hospital three hours later, he might have died. He had to go through a very difficult time trying to give up steroids. In fact, it was like giving up drugs like cocaine or heroine. He needed the help of a psychiatric, but in the end he made it. Today, two years later, he feels much better and can have a normal life, Nevertheless, he suffers from some side effects such as depression,deafness and lack of testosterone, because his body is unable to produce it. It's no wonder, given that he spent twenty years having these substances.
Nov 24, 2014 9:55 PM
Corrections · 2

Steroids

Alberto began to go (otra opción: started going) to the gym because he wanted to make his body stronger. In the beginning, he took it easy and practised two or three times a week, just for fun. At some point he asked to another user of the gym what he did to have such a nice body.  This man told him about a harmless substances (steroids) (solamente le explicó una sustancia), which could help him strengthen his body very quickly. Little by little, Alberto began to take this substances and to go to the gym every day (everyday es un adjetivo, every day es un adverbio). Some time later, he would go to the gym on a daily basis, and spend two hours there. He was very happy because his body was very much to his liking, and to everyone else's.  He was buying more and more steroids until he was spending his entire salary on them.  However, he was so obssessed with his training, that he didn't realize that his life was an absolute mess. Then, one morning he felt terribly ill and went to the hospital. There he was told that he had a very serious liver problem. If he had gone to hospital three hours later, he might have died. He had to go through a very difficult time trying to give up steroids. In fact, it was like giving up drugs like cocaine or heroine. He needed the help of a psychiatrist, but in the end he made it.
Today, two years later, he feels much better and can have a normal life (otra opción: lead a normal life).  Nevertheless, he suffers from some side effects such as depression, deafness, and a lack of testosterone, because his body is unable to produce it.  It's no wonder, given that he spent twenty years taking this substances.

 

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Well done Carlos.  You used a lot of expressions that sound natural to me.  That's not an easy thing to do.  I know I personally find it difficult when writing in Spanish to avoid letting English constructions slip in, even if there is nothing wrong grammar wise.

November 25, 2014
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