Accepting an Authority and Still Feeling Good To accept an authority can be sometimes challenging. It is most challenging in situations when you don't perceive a person as the authority. It happens to

Pavel

Accepting an Authority and Still Feeling Good To accept an authority can be sometimes challenging. It is most challenging in situations when you don't perceive a person as the authority. It happens to me and I think I am not alone. Sometimes I just think that I am right, but I am actually not, or I just do not trust the person. It happens to me in case of conversation with my boss in matter of creating presentations. I want them simple and friendly and he wants them to be more academical and full of text. We will probably never agree on this matter, but we both require a professional attitude and good relationships with our clients. There comes another problem and that's how we perceive word professional... Well, it is always about communication. How to feel OK when you receive feedback or humiliating instructions from someone who has been given the authority to, like your boss, mentor, coach? It is always difficult to do not feel bad and to start asking, but that is the only thing which helps me to feel good and to take the power from "authority". I just ask over and over again until I understand it. Then I know that I should change one small thing or I will change nothing, it depends on me and my reaction to the feedback. I have my own vision and my boss/mentor/coach has his own. We do not need to be always on the same wave or to go in the same direction. One interesting thing which I realized is that our mind has a problem with statistics. I can do one thing over and over again in the same way and nothing happens. For example, I can drive my bike 70 km/h down a hill and nothing happens to me. Once I fall down or something unexpected happen to me and then I do not want drive 70 km/h for a long time or never again. This is the statistic problem which is helpful actually. Because I do not need to be alive if I have to proof that something is statistically important, like to fall down on bike 80 times, so I like this thing. Problem appears in case of fears and also accepting feedback from authority. Then this thing is not helpful, but it is able to hurt us. For example: My boss tells me, that I have done something very wrong and I should not do it again even when I have done that thing 200 times before very well. Then I can feel bad (as a result of our non-statistical part of brain) or can analyze the matter with my boss and still feel good. Which attitude it better? ;) Pavel

Feb 28, 2015 8:30 PM

Corrections · 6

Accepting an Authority and Still Feeling Good

To accept an someone's authority can be sometimes challenging. It is most challenging in situations when you don't perceive a person as being the/having authority. It happens to me, and I think I am not alone. Sometimes I just think that I am right, but when in fact I am actually not, or perhaps I just do not trust the person. It happened (habitually? or once?) to me in case of a conversation/discussions(s) with my boss in over the matter of/about creating presentations. I want them simple and friendly, and while/whereas he wants them to be more academical and wordy/verbose full of text. We will probably never agree on this matter, but we both agree they require a professional attitude and should sustain good relationships with our clients. There comes another problem and that concerns how we perceive/our conception of the word 'professional'... Well, it is always about communication.

How to feel OK when you receive feedback or (what you consider to be) humiliating instructions from someone who (like your boss) has been given the authority to, like your boss, mentor, coach? It is always difficult to do not avoid feeling bad and or to start questioning/arguing asking, but that is the only thing which helps me to feel good and to take the power away from the "authority". I just ask over and over again until I understand it. Then I know that I should change one small thing or I will change nothing, it depends on me and my reaction to the feedback. I have my own vision and my boss/mentor/coach has his own. We do not need to be always on the same wave, nor to be going in exactly the same direction. One interesting thing which I realized is that our mind has a problem with statistics(???)/probability???. I can do one thing over and over again in the same way and nothing happens. For example, I can drive ride my bike/bicycle? at 70 kph down a hill and nothing happens to me. Once I fall down or something unexpected happens to me, and then I do not want drive ride at 70 kph for a long time, perhaps or never again. This is the statistic problem/question of chance which is helpful/useful actually. Because I do not need to be alive if I have to proof prove that something is statistically(?) important/significant, like to falling down on a/the bike 80 times, so I like this thing. (only the vaguest inkling what you mean here!)

A problem appears/arises in case of fear, and also in accepting feedback from authority. Then this thing is not helpful, but it is able to hurt us. For example: My boss tells me, that I have done something very wrong and I should not do it again, even when I have done that thing 200 times before very well. Then I can feel bad (as a result of our the non-statistical part of brain) or can analyze the matter with my boss and still feel good. Which attitude it better? ;)

Pavel

March 1, 2015

Accepting an Authority and Still Feeling Good

To accept an authority can sometimes be challenging. It is most challenging in situations when you don't perceive a person as having authority. It happens to me and I think that I am not alone. Sometimes I just think that I am right, but I am actually not, or I just do not trust the person. It happens to me in case of conversation with my boss in the matter of creating presentations. I want them to be simple and friendly and he wants them to be more academical and full of text. We will probably never agree on this matter, but we both require a professional attitude and good relationships with our clients. There comes another problem and that's how we perceive word professional... Well, it is always about communication.

How can you feel OK when you receive feedback or humiliating instructions from someone who has been given the authority to, like your boss, mentor, coach? It is always difficult to do, not to feel bad and to start asking, but that is the only thing which helps me to feel good and to take the power from "authority". I just ask over and over again until I understand it. Then I know that I should change one small thing or I will change nothing, it depends on me and my reaction to the feedback. I have my own vision and my boss/mentor/coach has his own. We do not need to always be on the same wavelength or to go in the same direction. One interesting thing which I realized is that I have a problem with statistics. I can do one thing over and over again in the same way and nothing happens. For example, I can drive my bike 70 km/h down a hill and nothing happens to me. Once I fall down or something unexpected happens to me and then I do not want drive 70 km/h for a long time or never again. This is the statistic problem which is helpful, actually. Because I do not need to be alive if I have to proof that something is statistically important, like to fall down on bike 80 times, so I like this thing.

Problems appears in case of fears and also accepting feedback from authority. Then this thing is not helpful, but it is able to hurt us. For example: My boss tells me, that I have done something very wrong and I should not do it again even when I have done that thing 200 times before very well. Then I can feel bad (as a result of our non-statistical part of brain) or can analyze the matter with my boss and still feel good. Which attitude it better? ;)

Pavel