[Deleted]
My first English poem My name is the name of the world. When I write, for every black point, a rose becomes full of loliness, and my dreams die in the wind. If I speak to you, my voice will talk to your heart; meanwhile, my eyes will open your soul. For who will I sing? My voice is full of hope but my mind thinks for the worst. Help my life to fly in the clouds and cry of happiness for the sky. Goodbye little child, hope what you search you will find.
Mar 4, 2015 2:32 PM
Corrections · 5
1

Hi Ilaria.

It is difficult to correct a poem, so I won't try.

but:

"For WHOM will I sing?

and

"I hope that what you search for (are searching for), you will find."

----

:)

March 4, 2015

My first English poem

My name is the name of the world.
When I write, for every black point,
a rose becomes full of loneliness,
and my dreams die in the wind.
If I speak to you, my voice will
talk to your heart; meanwhile,
my eyes will open your soul.
For who will I sing?
My voice is full of hope
but my mind thinks for the worst.
Help my life to fly in the clouds
and cry of happiness for the sky.
Goodbye little child,
hope what you search you will find.

March 4, 2015
Want to progress faster?
Join this learning community and try out free exercises!