Ya-hsien
My first experience of delivering a English presentation I told myself to ignore the black statue on my left and focused on my audience who were chatting with each other . But I failed. It was Mr. Fei, my new English teacher, who was still in the corner of my eye and mind. Mr. Fei is a passionate and strict mid-aged teacher with a silky or, occasionally, frightening voice. I set my sights on him, noticing that he wore suits again which made him look more serious. Standing on the rostrum alone, I took a deep breath and glancing at my classmates, seeking for my group partners' seats. We spent a whole weekend on Mr. Fei's troublesome homework. Topic chosen, material gathered, posts designed, scripts written and rewritten, and here I was, trying to show our little crystallization of the wisdom and knowledge--a brief introduction to chocolate. I found them without much difficulty, for them sat fairly close to the rostrum, to me. And they both looked at me encouragingly, which gave me great comfort. Mr. Fei's tough voice dispelled my visions of that weekend. 'Silence! 'He shouted. All chirps and twitters ended instantly. Then he turned back, standing towards me. Everyone else was waiting for me with total attention as well now. 'Hello everyone', I started and paused. Too cheerful, I thought. I resisted the urge to say my opening gambit again, and continued, 'Chocolate, as known to all, is well spread all across the world since--' 'Write it' the teacher spoken suddenly, 'Your topic. Write it on the blackboard'. My hands were trembling but I managed to grasp a piece of chalk. Then I misspelt the word 'chocolate'. Whole class burst into laugher when Mr. Fei pointed out my error in an understanding tone. So far, so bad. I took another deep breath and resumed to recite our carefully edited script. I did not freeze on the stage for forgetting my lines. On the contrary, I paused a second time for speaking too fast and I failed to caught my breath. My hearts beat quickly and loudly. Two stressful minutes elapsed then Liu, one of our group members, stepped on the rostrum to help me show the post. 'Slow down your speed' she whispered as she walked pass me. I promised I would with a nod of my head. But I failed in calming myself down. I kept delivering my presentation quickly and my volume raised and raised in a state of great agitation. I gave them a glimpse. Liu sat there expressionlessly. [the last paragraph is in the picture ].
Mar 27, 2015 2:01 PM
Corrections · 2
1

My first experience of delivering a English presentation

I told myself to ignore the black statue on my left and focused on my audience who were chatting with each other . But I failed. It was Mr. Fei, my new English teacher, who was still in the corner of my eye and mind. Mr. Fei is a passionate and strict middle-aged teacher with a silky or occasionally, frightening voice. I set my sights on him, noticing that he wore that suit again which made him look more serious.

Standing on the rostrum alone, I took a deep breath and glancing at my classmates, looking for my group partners' seats. We spent a whole weekend on Mr. Fei's troublesome homework. Topic chosen, material gathered, posts designed, scripts written and rewritten, and here I was, trying to show our little crystallization of the wisdom and knowledge--a brief introduction to chocolate. I found them without much difficulty, for they sat fairly close to the rostrum, to me. And They both looked at me encouragingly, which gave me great comfort.

Mr. Fei's tough voice dispelled my visions of that weekend. 'Silence! 'He shouted. All chirps and twitters ended instantly. Then he turned back, standing looking towards me. Everyone else was waiting for me with total attention as well now.

'Hello everyone', I started and paused. Too cheerful, I thought. I resisted the urge to say my opening gambit again, and continued, 'Chocolate, as known to all, is well spread all across the world since--'

'Write it' the teacher spoken suddenly, 'Your topic. Write it on the blackboard'. My hands were trembling but I managed to grasp a piece of chalk. Then I misspelt the word 'chocolate'. Whole class burst into laugher when Mr. Fei pointed out my error in an understanding tone.

So far, so bad. I took another deep breath and resumed to recite our carefully edited script. I did not freeze on the stage for forgeting my lines. On the contrary, I paused a second time for speaking too fast and I failed to catch   my breath. My heart beat quickly and loudly. Two stressful minutes elapsed then Liu, one of our group members, stepped on the rostrum to help me present the post*.'Slow down your speed' she whispered as she walked pass me. I promised I would with a nod of my head. 


But I failed in calming myself down. I kept delivering my presentation quickly and my volume raised and raised in a state of great agitation. I gave them a glimpse. Liu sat there expressionlessly.

[the last paragraph is in the picture ].

only minor corrections, red bits are not neededlilac added extra wordit was ok would also sugest changing"post*"to presentation

March 27, 2015
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