Anna
Living in the countryside or in the city In my oppinion,living in the countryside is far better than in the city. The first reason is the countryside's environment is clean and fresh. No noisy cars, no dirty factories, no mordern skycraper and no people crampered together at all times. The second , I have always loved the serenty in the countryside. When I look up, it is the blue sky with birds that spear through the white clouds. When I look down, it is the endless green field of barley where cows and sheep are grazing in leisure. Additionally, living in the countryside is much cheaper, so you probably can afford many useful things. Last but not least, in the rural area, the crime rate is much slower. Therefore, people can truly live in peacefulness. In summary, people are always live better when they are far away from the noisy city.
May 4, 2015 10:34 PM
Corrections · 10
1

Living in the countryside or in the city

In my opinion, living in the countryside is far better than in the city. The first reason is that the countryside's environment is clean and fresh. There aren't any noisy cars, no dirty factories, no modern skycrapers and no people cramped together at all times. The second reason is that I have always loved the serenity in the countryside. When I look up, it is the blue sky with birds that spear through the white clouds and when I look down, it is the endless green fields of barley where cows and sheep are grazing in leisure. Additionally, living in the countryside is much cheaper, so you probably can afford many useful things. Last but not least, in the rural area, the crime rate is much lower therefore, people can truly live in peace. In summary, people always live better when they are far away from the noisy city.

 

You are a really good writer, very descriptive...that's really very rare in a language-learner. Have you been working on your English writing for a while?

 

My best!

-Amy

May 4, 2015
1

Living in the Countryside or in the City?


In my oppinion,_living in the countryside is far better than in the city. The first reason is The countryside's [understood from your first sentence] environment is clean and fresh and clean -- no noisy cars; no dirty polluting factories; no mordern skycraper to speak of and no jammed packed people like canned sardines crampered together at all times. The second , I have always loved the serenity in of the countryside. [There's a difference in meaning using "in" and "of"] Whenever I look gaze upwards, it is the blue sky is blue;  with birds that spear [sound so vicious and aggressive] soaring through the white fleeced clouds... And whenever I look peer down from any high elevation, it is the but an endless green field of barley fields where cows and sheep graze lazily are grazing in leisure ["leisure" is for people]. Additionally, living in On the more practical side, the countryside living is so much cheaper, so you probably can afford many useful things. Last but not least, in the rural area, and the crime rate is insignificant. much slower. Therefore, people can truly live in peacefulness. In summary, people are always live better when they are far away from the noisy city. I say, bucolic life is always superior to the rat race of the city.


Your ideas are good and understandable (this is why I can correct).  You need learn how to express more naturally and not using words like, "first", "second", "therefore", "in summary", etc.  They make the writing so legal-like, cold and uncaring. Worse of all, they sound like a lecture. You are "selling" the virtues of country life.  So make it colorful and sway the opinion of the listener.  Anyway, it is still a good piece.  With enough practice, you will improve very well.  I don't see major grammar errors.  A piece with perfect grammar does not mean that it is a good piece of writing.  A good command of vocabulary is almost a must in such kinds of writing.

May 5, 2015

Living in the countryside or in the city

In my oppinion, living in the countryside is far better than (living) in the city. The first reason; is the countryside's environment is clean and fresh. No noisy cars, no dirty factories, no mordern skycrapers and no people cramped together at all times. The second; is I have always loved the serenty in the countryside. When I look up, I see the blue sky with birds that spear through the white clouds. When I look down, I see the endless green field of barley where cows and sheep are grazing in leisure. Additionally, living in the countryside is much cheaper, so you probably can afford many useful things. Last but not least, in the rural areas, the crime rate is much lower. Therefore, people can truly live in peacefulness peace. In summary, people are always live better when they are far away from the noisy city.

 

 

Good job!!

May 4, 2015
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