Kiri
Let Me Introduce Myself Pt. 2/3 Sequel to Pt. 1 When I was in the first grade in university, I took up a part-time job at Asahi Shimbun which is one of the largest newspaper companies in Japan, where I had worked for three years. My job was miscellaneous supports around making up articles or pages. Throughout the experiences, I learned processes over making newspapers. While the job was extremely tough, I received incredible wages. Having a lot of money, I spent for some luxuries and got to have interest more widely in various things out there. One of them that influenced my following life was to make my own cloths. Eventually I decided to go to cloth-making school without becoming a company worker. The school I went to was Bunka Fashion College that maybe was the most popular in the field. I learned a lot of things about cloths such as fashion design, tailoring, sewing, draughting, pattern making, production control, business theory and so forth. Now I still sometimes make my own cloths, it's getting less frequent, though. I'm also able to make women's wear if somebody asks. This article continues in Pt. 3
Aug 1, 2015 12:16 AM
Corrections · 3

Let Me Introduce Myself Pt. 2/3

Sequel to Pt. 1

When I was in the first grade in of university, I took up a part-time job at Asahi Shimbun which is one of the largest newspaper companies in Japan, where I had worked I worked there for three years. My job was miscellaneous supports around making up articles or pages. Throughout the experiences, I learned processes over involved in making newspapers. While the job was extremely tough, I received incredible wages. Having Since I had a lot of money, I spent for some on luxuries and got to have interest more widely in various things out there a wide variety of things. One of them thing that influenced my following (this word is not really needed) life was learning how to make my own clothes.

Eventually I decided to go to a clothes-making school without becoming a company worker. The school I went to was Bunka Fashion College that maybe was the most popular in the field. I learned a lot of things about clothes such as fashion design, tailoring, sewing, draughting, pattern making, production control, business theory and so forth. Now I still sometimes make my own clothing, it's getting less frequent, though. I'm also able to make women's wear if somebody asks me to (the sentence reads better if you add this)


This article continues in Pt. 3

 

RED- Words/phrases that are wrong.
GREEN- Words that I would use to replace wrong words/phrases.
ORANGE- Words that aren't incorrect but could be replaced with better words.
YELLOW- Places where I added punctuation.
BLUE- When I am not sure of your meaning.

 

I hope this helps you :)

August 3, 2015
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