Jeremy
Morning stroll 因为最近纽约的天气很好,所以今天早上以后早饭我在我的邻居走路。 Because the weather has been so nice lately, this morning, after breakfast, I went for a walk around my neighborhood. 这个星期我在家工作,所以我忘了离家,呼吸,和走路。 I’ve been working from home this week, so forget to leave the apartment and get some fresh air and exercise. 我住在纽约Upper East Side了两年半了。我很喜欢住在这儿。在这儿很安全,有很多饭馆,火车站近,和只需要五分钟到中央公园。 I’ve lived on the Upper East Side for two and a half years and I like it here a lot. It’s safe, has a lot of restaurants, close to my train station, and best of all, it’s 5 minutes from Central Park. 因为住在纽约很贵,还我的办公室远,所以今年十二月我们会搬到Stamford。我会想念住在纽约,但是Stamford和纽约是互相靠近。我们想念纽约的时候,可以回来。 Living in New York can be expensive and it’s far from my office, so this December we’re moving to Stamford. I’ll miss living in New York, but we’ll only be 45 minutes away when we want to come back.
Aug 26, 2015 5:32 PM
Corrections · 3
2

Morning stroll

 

因为最近纽约的天气很好,所以今天早上以后早饭我在我的邻居走路在吃过早餐后,我就到邻里散步
Can also use "由于"instead of "因为"
"早饭"="早餐", both of them are usable here
neighborhood=邻里  neighbor=邻居 


Because the weather has been so nice lately, this morning, after breakfast, I went for a walk around my neighborhood.


这个星期我一直在家工作,所以忙得忘了离公寓到外面去呼吸新鲜空气走路做运动
apartment=公寓  breathe=呼吸  fresh air=新鲜空气  exercise=做运动 

I’ve been working from home this week, so forget to leave the apartment and get some fresh air and exercise.


我住在纽约Upper East Side已经有两年半的时间了。我很喜欢住在这儿。这儿很安全,有很多饭馆火车站很近。棒的是,只需要五分钟到中央公园这儿里中央公园只需要5分钟的路程
best of all:很棒的是 

I’ve lived on the Upper East Side for two and a half years and I like it here a lot. It’s safe, has a lot of restaurants, close to my train station, and best of all, it’s 5 minutes from Central Park.


因为住在纽约很贵,而且我的办公室远,所以今年十二月我们会搬到Stamford居住。我会想念住在纽约的生活,但是由于Stamford和纽约是互相靠近不远,所以我们想念纽约的时候,只需要45分钟就可以回到那儿

Living in New York can be expensive and it’s far from my office, so this December we’re moving to Stamford. I’ll miss living in New York, but we’ll only be 45 minutes away when we want to come back.

August 26, 2015
1

Morning stroll

因为最近纽约 There's no NY in your English 的天气很好,所以今天早上以后早饭我在我的邻居走一走路 means to "walk on the road", "to travel by road", so it does not match your English intent.  走一走 or 走走 means to "walk around", exactly in the same color and nuance as in your English.

Because the weather has been so nice lately, this morning, after breakfast, I went for a walk around my neighborhood.


这个星期我在家工作,所以我忘了出门离家离家 means to "leave home (and embark on a long journey or never to return etc) 出门 literally means "out of the door" in the sense of going out for awhile. 呼吸, This means to "breathe".  So what you are saying is "I forgot to breathe".  納些新鮮空气 和 运动一下[子]走路

I’ve been working from home this week, so forget to leave the apartment and get some fresh air and exercise.


我住在纽约 的上東辺已有 (Upper East Side)两年半了。我很喜欢住在这儿。在这儿很安全,有很多饭馆,火车站也在附 和只需 最好的, 只要五分钟 [的走路], 就可以到中央公园

I’ve lived on the Upper East Side for two and a half years and I like it here a lot. It’s safe, has a lot of restaurants, close to my train station, and best of all, it’s 5 minutes from Central Park.


因为住在纽约可以是,还我的办公室远,因此所以今年十二月我们会搬 Stamford。我会想念住在纽约的生活...住在纽约的生活 would be the exact translation but "living", though grammatically correct would be considered redundant since "lifestyle" encompasses "living" as well. Same thing that in English, "why" after "reason" is considered redundant and bad grammar  是 不过Stamford, 只离纽约是互相靠近 四十五分鈡, 。我们想念纽约的时候,可以回来 是不大的阻碍This way is without changing your Chinese sentence structure.  Restructuring like this would be more "natural" Chinese by your essay context and meaning... 如果真的太想念, 可以隨时回去逛逛, 因为纽约隔Stamford, 只有四十五分鈡的时间 = If I really miss it, I can go back anytime as New Your and Stamford are only 45 minutes apart.

Living in New York can be expensive and it’s far from my office, so this December we’re moving to Stamford. I’ll miss living in New York, but we’ll only be 45 minutes away when we want to come back.

 

On the whole, you wrote good because I can understand what you wrote without referring to your English for details.  It is good that you provided the English version since I can help you articulate the exact nuance of your intent.

August 26, 2015

Morning stroll

因为最近纽约的天气很好,所以今天早上以后早饭在我的邻居走路到街坊走走【街坊是地点,地方,邻里,邻居是指人际关系】。

Because the weather has been so nice lately, this morning, after breakfast, I went for a walk around my neighborhood.


这个星期我在家工作,所以我忘了离家到外面去呼吸新鲜空气和走路 活动活动

I’ve been working from home this week, so forget to leave the apartment and get some fresh air and exercise.


我住在纽约Upper East Side两年半了。我很喜欢住在这儿。在这儿很安全,有很多饭馆,火车站近,还有【走】去中央公园只需要五分钟到中央公园

I’ve lived on the Upper East Side for two and a half years and I like it here a lot. It’s safe, has a lot of restaurants, close to my train station, and best of all, it’s 5 minutes from Central Park.


因为住在纽约很贵,还我的办公室远,所以今年十二月【】我们会搬到Stamford。我会想念住在纽约【的日子】,但是Stamford和纽约是互相靠近相邻很近。我们想念纽约的时候,可以回来。

Living in New York can be expensive and it’s far from my office, so this December we’re moving to Stamford. I’ll miss living in New York, but we’ll only be 45 minutes away when we want to come back.

August 28, 2015
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