João Paulo
I'm Just The Trash of The World Today when I was on a bus returning to my house, a boy (I think he is about 17 years old) started speaking with a guy who was sitting behind me. That boy said something like: "Excuse me. Don't be afraid, I'm not a thief. I live in the streets and I'm a guy who doesn't like the government like you. I didn't vote in our president because I don't vote. I also don't have ID card and I don't pay taxes. I'm addicted to crack and I need money for it. I'm just the trash of the world. As I said I'm not a thief, so I prefer to ask for money instead of stealing. Could you help me with some coins, please? I need to buy drugs." The other guy gave R$2.00 to the boy. I am accustomed to see people asking for money. But that boy surprised me a little bit. Could you correct my mistakes, please? Thank you!!
Sep 1, 2015 11:55 PM
Corrections · 4
2

I'm Just The Trash of The World

Today, when I was on a bus returning home to my house, a boy (I think he was is about 17 years old) started speaking with a guy who was sitting behind me. That The boy said something like, "Excuse me. Don't be afraid. I'm not a thief. I live in the streets, and I'm a guy who doesn't like the government same as like you. I didn't vote in our president because I don't vote. I also don't have an ID card, and I don't pay taxes. I'm addicted to crack, and I need money for it. I'm just the trash of the world. As I said, I'm not a thief, so I prefer to ask for money instead of stealing. Could you help me with some coins, please? I need to buy drugs." The other guy gave R$2.00 to the boy.

I am accustomed to seeing people asking for money, but that boy surprised me a little bit.

Could you correct my mistakes, please?

Thank you!!

 

Good work! The main thing I see that is missing is the comma. If you have two sentences that can stand alone (subject + verb) and you use the word "and" to combine them into one sentence, then you need a comma before the and. For example: I like music. I have a radio. I like music, and I have a radio. Same thing for your very last sentence - I am accustomed to seeing people asking for money. That boy surprised me a little bit. Both can be sentences. You need a comma before the "but". 

The rule for this is I, c/c I  (Independent clause, coordinating conjunction independent clause) Simply: Sentence, c/c sentence

C/C - coordinating conjunctions are easy to remember - they spell the word (made up word) FANBOYS

For, And, Nor, But, Or, Yet, So

 

Hope this helps. Didn't mean to go on and on. I am procrastinating - I need to study my German!

September 2, 2015
Thank you man!!
September 5, 2015
Whoa, how did I miss this post? Great entry, man. Theresa already did a great correction, I think she only missed the preposition "for" as in: "I didn't vote FOR our president because I don't vote"
September 5, 2015
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