in the dark When I stared to live a independent life and take responsibilities of my current as well as future life, I was so excited and full of energy because I thought I can pursue my dream in the

Branden Keller

in the dark When I stared to live a independent life and take responsibilities of my current as well as future life, I was so excited and full of energy because I thought I can pursue my dream in the exact way I want, I wanted to make sure every second in my life worth. But it was not long before I realized that I was not totally in control of myself, there wasn't anyone to hold me back or something, the enemy who was putting my enthusiastic down was me, the demon part of me. The dark of the night is not scary to me, but I was soaked in the dark that fall with the demon in my heart, I was starting to worry about myself. I'm still in this dark, and the only weapon I got is the faith that not to give up on myself. It's really a terrible war I am in. But, still I can't give up, maybe life is all about hang in there.

Oct 4, 2015 10:45 AM

Corrections · 4

in the dark

When I stared to live an independent life and take responsibilities for my current, as well as future, life, I was so excited and full of energy because I thought I could pursue my dreams in the exact way I wanted. I sought to make sure every second in my life held worth. Yet, it was not long before I realized that I was not totally in control of myself, there wasn't anyone to hold me back or something. The enemy who was putting my enthusiasm down was me, the demon part of me. The dark of the night is not scary to me, but I was soaked in the dark that fall with the demon in my heart, I was starting to worry about myself. I'm still in this dark, and the only weapon I have is the faith that not to not give up on myself. It's really a terrible war I am in. But, still I can't give up, maybe life is all about hanging in there.

The underlined part is a run on sentence. It can be fixed by adding a period in between two individual thoughts.

October 7, 2015

Hyzurk, thank you. It is so much better after your corrections.

October 12, 2015

When I decided to start living an independent life, to take responsability for my current life as well as my future, I was so excited and energized. It was because I thought I can pursue my dream and I wanted to make sure every second of my life is not spent in vain. But soon I realised that I was not totally in control of myself. There wasn't anyone holding me back or anything. The enemy that was dragging me down was the demon side of me. I am not afraid of pitch dark, but I was soaked by the darkness that befell with the demon in my heart. I was starting to worry about myself. I'm still in this darkness with the only weapon I got, the faith that doesn't allow me to give up on myself. It is truly a terrible war I am fighting. Still, I can't give up. Maybe life is all about hanging in there.

October 12, 2015

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