Should the Japanese government encourage more immigration?
This essay title is from the EIKEN Test in Practical English Proficiency, (a) very popular English test in Japan.
Could you check my essay?
The essay includes some (of the) rules () below ;
*Write an essay on the given TOPIC covering three of the POINTS below.
*Structure : Three or more paragraphs, including an introduction and conclusion
*Length : Around 200 words
TOPIC
Should the Japanese government encourage more immigration?
POINTS
・Birthrate (My choice)
・Costs
・Identity
・Tax
・Workforce (My choice)
・Culture (My choice)
Looking around the world, many countries accept immigrants and grow their economy thanks to their powers. Considering the Japan's low growth in economy, Japanese government should encourage more immigration.
Birth rate in Japan is very (low) compared with other developed countries. (Moreover), we are facing (an) aging society and lacking () people who will support elderly peple. (Large) number of immigrants (may) solve the problem.
Immigrants will also be workforce especially for rural areas. We (lack in) those who work as farmers and fishermen, although we cannot live without them. What is worse (is that) young (people) (hesitate to succeed) such (jobs) and that causes traditional skills disappear. Immigrants have a chance to help rural areas.
Not only do we have a good effect on economy, but also do we have a possitive effect on our culture. (Do you mean, 'Not only does immigration have a good impact on our economy, but also our culture.'?) It is said that Japanese culture is diverse, but isolated from the world. Nowadays, many foreigners visit Japan, but we cannot make ourselves understood in their language. If immigrants settle in Japan, we have (many opportunities) to talk to them in their language and brush the speaking skill. Finally, we can deliver our own culture to the world by ourselves.
By accepting immigrants, we can solve the big (economical and cultural issues).
220 words
It is a good essay, bro. I ,too, feel that Japan should take in more people. Hopefully, one day I can live in Japan. :)