Miriam
There was once a limerick
Yesterday, I posted a discussion about St. Patrick's Day (Erin go bragh! St. Patrick's Day! <a href="https://www.italki.com/discussion/230049" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.italki.com/discussion/230049</a>;)
and there I also mentioned a couple of Irish words. One of them was "limerick" and I thought it would be a fun exercise to learn how to write limericks. A limerick is a kind of silly and funny poem: <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limerick_(poetry)</a>.

I found an explanation for kids on how to write a limerick:

"The first, second and fifth lines rhyme with each other and have the same number of syllables (typically 8 or 9).
The third and fourth lines rhyme with each other and have the same number of syllables (typically 5 or 6)
Limericks often start with the line "There once was a..." or "There was a..."" (<a href="https://www.kidzone.ws/poetry/limerick.htm" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.kidzone.ws/poetry/limerick.htm</a>;)

These are two examples of limericks:

To Miss Vera Beringer (By Lewis Carroll):
“There was a young lady of station
‘I love man’ was her sole exclamation;
But when men cried: ‘You flatter,’
She replied, ‘Oh! no matter
Isle of Man is the true explanation.'”

There was an Old Man in a tree (by Edward Lear)
There was an Old Man in a tree,
Who was horribly bored by a Bee;
  When they said, 'Does it buzz?'
  He replied, 'Yes, it does!'
'It's a regular brute of a Bee!'

Ok, this is my first try at a limerick:

There was once a language learner
Who wasn't much of a big earner
He sent messages galore
Sadly, the ladies he bore
Seems, he also wasn't a charmer

I'm a bit rusty when it comes to writing poems (I know that "charmer" is not a perfect rhyme to "learner"). Two years ago, when I published the discussion "Poetry Slam" (<a href="https://www.italki.com/discussion/164259" rel="noopener noreferrer" target="_blank">https://www.italki.com/discussion/164259</a>;) I was more active in this field. If you like to rhyme, check that discussion out. All participants only posted in rhymes.

So, who's up for a limerick challenge?
Mar 17, 2020 6:54 PM
Comments · 19
7
There was once a new virus
That made people desirous
Of all toilet paper they spied
So for it, they all vied,
Which for mummies was a big minus.
March 18, 2020
6
The COVID it seems is a sensation
It jumps from one to the next nation
Governments flights banish
And toilet papers vanish
While economies get into stagnation

On the lighter side, toilet paper could be our new currency and they will be called butt coin.
March 19, 2020
6
There once was a person named Miriam,
Who said "Don't drive yourself to delirium;
Don't search for a week,
If an answer you seek;
There are folks here who know, so just query 'em."

March 18, 2020
4
Families and friendships have been torn asunder
Due to a single, unforgivable blunder
To avoid all this strife
And to live your best life
The toilet paper rotates not over, but under.


For folks in a tight money squeeze,
Don’t raise the bath tissue price, please.
Though it’s paper-made true,
This factor I rue:
Bathroom tissue does NOT grow on trees.


When wiping your bottom each day,
There's no telling how much you'll pay.
If paper were free
There'd be nary a tree,
So go get yourself a bidet.


National Toilet Paper Day (USA) will be celebrated on August 26th, 2020 (Believe it or not)


Richard's Question of the Day:
Why are people stocking up on a year's supply of toilet paper?
Do they know something I don't know?
:)


March 18, 2020
4
What your book for children might not have explained is that in English-speaking culture, "dirty" limericks are extremely popular. When I think of the word "limerick," the first thing that comes to mind... well, the first is Edward Lear, but the second is "dirty limericks."

I will not give any examples of dirty limericks.

But I will quote a limerick on the topic of dirty limericks. A "cleric" is a member of a religious hierarchy, such as a priest, bishop, etc. The limerick mentions examples of the Church of England hierarchy.

<em>Your verses, dear Fred, I surmise</em>
<em>Were not meant for clerical eyes;</em>
<em>The bishop and dean</em>
<em>Cannot </em>think<em> what they mean,</em>
<em>And the curate turns pink with surprise.</em>

(Fred's "verses" apparently contained sexual slang; the bishop and dean pretend not to understand it, while the curate is not as good at concealing his understanding).
March 18, 2020
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