Stefan
Today, it was partly cloudy in the morning and brilliantly sunny at noon. However, it suddenly rained and hailed in the afternoon. How unpredictable the weather is in Melbourne. My son was really excited to see so many like-marble hails hitting on the ground. Today was his first day to return to his remote learning in term 4. He happily showed his birthday gifts to his teather and classmates and shared some interesting things that happened on his holidays. Unfortunately, I accidentally hit my son's forehead while we were playing a kind of fighting game after dinner. Soon a big lump appeared on his forehead and the size was just like en egg. I really freaked out at that moment. My son didn't cry. I immediately took a package of frozen stir fry vegetables out of the refrigerator and put it on his forehead for a while. I'm relieved that the lump is fading gradually at the moment. I apologized to my son and he forgave me and said it was not my fault.
Oct 4, 2021 10:22 AM
Corrections · 7
Your English level is obviously advanced. There is nothing to fix here. I noticed that there is a spelling error for the word, teacher but I know it was most probably an honest typing error. You are good!👏
October 4, 2021
Today, it was partly cloudy in the morning and brilliantly sunny at noon. However, it suddenly rained and hailed in the afternoon. How unpredictable the weather is in Melbourne! My son was really excited to see so many marble-sized hail stones hitting on the ground. Today was his first day of returning to remote learning in term 4. He happily showed his birthday gifts to his teacher and classmates. He also shared some interesting things that happened on his holidays. Unfortunately, I accidentally hit my son's forehead while we were playing a kind of fighting game after dinner. Soon a big lump appeared on his forehead and the it was the size of egg. I really freaked out at that time, although my son didn't cry. I immediately took a package of frozen stir-fry vegetables out of the refrigerator and put it on his forehead for a while. I'm relieved that the lump is gradually fading. I apologized to my son and he forgave me and said it was not my fault.
Very well written overall. You have an engaging style which draws the reader in. Compliments on good sentence structure and vocabulary. 🙏😊
October 4, 2021
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