I totally agree Richard, learning a language can be fun and those translations are one of the best parts of learning a new language ;) Thank you very much for explaining more about them, this is very useful. Also I'm thankful to you Ivanovich for clarifying the cemetary visiting times, that was enlightening :)

Richard, may I correct you? I know this ad from the Novodevichy Cemetery in Moscow. It lies next to the southern wall of the 16th-century Novodevichy Convent, which is the city's third most popular tourist site.

AT A CEMETARY
- You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday.

AT A CEMETARY
- You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous composers, artists and writers were buried, you can visit  this cemetery every day, but it is closed  on Thursday. (Mumtaz is right - Visiting times: Friday - Wednesday.)

Richard, I honestly can't stop laughing! And I need to work, but I keep laughing at those hilarious translations ;D hehehehehe

 Ok, let me give it a try, and if I ended up making them even more funny, we can laugh even more ;D

1. AT A CEMETARY: <em>I guess no one is buried on Thursday ;)</em>

Here's my try:<em> You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous composers, artists and writers are buried. </em>Visiting times: Friday - Wednesday.

2. DOCTOR’S OFFICE: <em>I'm afraid that women are diseases ;)</em>

<em>- Specialist in </em>women's diseases and other diseases as well.

3. RESTAURANT: <em>I guess their wines are so bad, they leave you with nothing to hope</em> for and kill your imagination<em> ;P</em>
<em>- Our wines</em> are so good, they'll fulfill all your senses.

4. DRY CLEANERS: Oh my God! This one is REALLY funny ;D hehe

- Bring your dirty clothes and they'll be cleaned in a few hours.

5. CAMP GROUNDS: 
- It is strictly forbidden on our camping site that single men and women share tents.

6. BUDDIST TEMPLE: 

- Women from any background are forbidden from entering the temple if they are dressed like men.

PS: Did I understand in the right way? :')

Richard, Russian and English are so different and this ad is a word-for-word translation from Russian "Мы приглашаем вас посетить кладбище, где похоронены известные композиторы, художники и писатели, ежедневно кроме четверга" into English "You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous composers, artists and writers were buried daily except Thursday".

It is a complex sentence, which has a main clause and a subordinate clause. 

In Russian the Present Tense is used 'are buried' - it is like 'have been buried' because they are still there (at the cemetery), I can use the Past Tense here - 'were buried' in Russian, but it is like 'had been buried' in English.

Ivanovich...

Of course you may correct me.

After all, I was just guessing at what these quotes meant, and guessing means that the chance of me being right may be very low.

The reason I interpreted the quote the way I did is becuase of the placement of one phrase in the sentence:

- You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous composers, artists and writers are buried daily except Thursday.

"buried daily except Thursday" tells me that the deceased are buried every day but not on Thursday.

I would not have mis-interpreted the sentence so badly if it had been written as follows:

- You are welcome to visit the cemetery daily except Thursday, where famous composers, artists and writers are buried.

Thank you for explaining the correct interpretation.