We often hear people say that you must have a goal in life, or you must have a target when you want to achieve something. Most people would say something like “I want to earn a million dollars in my life, that’s my goal in life”; some people say “I want to be a doctor, or an engineer, an entrepreneur, or …”, you know, the kind of ambition that makes you feel proud; some people say “I don’t want anything fancy or meaningful, I just want to live in peace and just be myself”. Are these goals? Maybe.

So what exactly is a goal?

Maybe I could share my recent experience here.

I met two total strangers at the gym yesterday and here is what happened:

I bumped into a lady in the steam room, I was chatting with her. She was telling me that she just changed her job to a new company and she was complaining that the traffic to the new workplace was bad, and that it was a pretty “old school” company that the employees have to practice clock-in-clock-out for coming in to work, she wasn’t happy with such strict time control. She told me she had to leave the previous company because most of her colleagues left, and she didn’t see any point staying there because she didn’t know what to do, so she followed the footsteps of her colleagues. Nevertheless, she told me that she would not stay in this new company for too long because of the conservative management style. As a matter of fact she actually quite enjoyed the flexibility and the system in her previous company which she already left. We didn’t speak too long then as she had to leave the steam room.

Then another lady came in. She told me it was her first time being in a steam room. She looked very lean and fit so I asked her what secret she had behind that. Then she shared with me that she was actually preparing to enter a fitness contest and that she’s been on a very strict and lean diet for 2.5 months. She could only have 100g of carbohydrate everyday and sometimes she felt dizzy because of the lack of carbohydrate hence the lack of blood pumped up to the brain. I was very impressed with her and asked her what made her decide to do this with such a tormenting diet and commitment. She told me it was her goal to enter the competition. I then asked why she’s doing this. She said she’s a nutritionist and she’s very much into fitness, she wants to have the experience of entering a fitness contest. I could see her passion talking about that, and as a result of her passion and goal - the lean body and the body line she possesses, is a dream beyond most women could ever have. I have my utmost salutation to her for having such an unbelievable commitment in trying to achieve her GOAL. I know how mentally and physically challenging it could be because I was once on a vegetarian diet for three months. All the inconvenience, judgement and temptation (I'm a foodie!) around me kept sending signals to me telling me not to be ridiculous, it was like fighting against gravity.

My encounter with these two ladies tells me the difference between two individuals with two different attitudes. Obviously, one without a goal, follows the intention of others rather than her own will and interest, she is not happy with where she is now and she is hanging on while waiting to see what happens next; whereas the other one with a goal which comes with her passion, interest and grit, has already manifested half the result of her goal while she’s pursuing it (she already has a very lean and fit body), she is excited and she can’t wait to see what happens next.

So… 

Do you have a goal? 

Yes!

Really?

Are you sure you are excited when you talk about it?

Well, yeah.. for now, yes, I am pumped!

Great! You think you could endure the suffer and commit like the lean and fit lady?

Hmm, maybe.. I'll try my best though!

...

Okay, maybe think again whether your “goal” is real enough (try to pinch your thigh hard and feel the sensation when you talk about it again)

…

So now you think you have a real goal?

Yes? (Did that pinch hurt and yet you didn't really bother because talking about the goal was way more sensational than that?!)

Great, your sensational journey just begins…