Hi Sophia, Awesome Hindi!
Few suggestions to improve your sentences are:
Meri teen bahan hain—> meri teen ‘bahane(n)’ hain.
Do doosari bahano Israel me rahati hain —> Do ‘bahane(n)’ Israel me rahati(n) hain.
Mere ‘kai rishtedar’ Israel me rahate hain. (Kai was mispronounced as kaai)