The sad thing

Today I received a piece of bad news from my grandma. She told me that my eld (do you mean old
?? or eldest) uncle had passed away----how astonished I was. Although he had two sons and a daughter, he was so kind to me. Still right now I can't accept the reality of his death. Because I love him, admire him and give him nothing to him.It is really upsetting me today.

blue-notes

red-changed

green-added

cross-wrong or changed to red

(dont worry my graddad passed away last week I know how you feel but you can get through this im sure your uncle would want you to be happy)

A sad thing

Today I received a piece of bad news from my grandma.

She told me that my eld uncle had passed away----how astonished I was.

eld什么意思？old？用astonished不是很恰当。astonished一般适用于难以理解、非常的事情，即便你叔叔（？）的逝世是突如其来的事情，但还算是正常的事情。可以用suprised来代替。还有，说"how astonished I was"是很诗意的语言，不算错，但不太适合这种非正式的作文。可以说“I was very surprised/astonished"。

Although he had two sons and a daughter, he was so kind to me.

语言方面没错，但逻辑有点奇怪，前半句与后半句有关系吗？

Still now I can't accept the reality of his death.

I still can't accept the reality of his death更地道。也可以说I still can't come to terms with his death。

Because I love him, admire him and give nothing to him. It really upseted me today.

首先，because句和结果要放在一个句子里：Because I love him, admire him and give nothing to him, it really upseted me today.

其次，什么叫give nothing to him？不管你想表达什么意思，这里不太适合用一般现在式。

最后，upset的过去式也是upset。

Because I love and admire him, it really upset me today.

好吧。希望你早日心情好起来。