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Jan
The original meaning of the line is quite simple: the lotus blossom has dropped its petals, and the lotus leaves have wilted. But would it be effective for the poet to simply directly say, “The lotus has dropped its petals, and its leaves have wilted”? This would be a very clear and straightforward way to put the meaning across.
Poems arouse associations through their use of symbols, at the most fundamental level through the building blocks of language, words themselves. When he had written it, he looked at it for a bit, and felt it was too simple, not good enough. This wording emphasizes that the spring wind not only arrived, not only passed over the place, but also turned the trees and grass green. The word “green” is used to very great effect. This is what is meant by a “microstructure.”
This combination of all this goodness and preciousness, with these verbs indicating fading, losing, or dilapidation, creates the sense of “a profusion of exquisite blossoms once lovely now rotting in weeds.”
2023年9月11日 11:55
訂正 · 1
The original meaning of the line is quite simple: the lotus blossom has lost its petals, and the leaves have wilted. But would it be effective for the poet to simply say, “The lotus has dropped its petals and its leaves have wilted?” This would be a very clear and straightforward way to put the meaning across.
Poems arouse associations through their use of symbols at the most fundamental level through their use of language building-blocks - words themselves. When he had written it, he looked at it for a bit, and felt it was too simple, not good enough. This wording emphasizes that the spring wind not only arrived; not only passed over the place, but also turned the trees and grass green. The word “green” is used to very great effect. This is what is meant by a “microstructure”.
The combination of all this goodness and preciousness, with these verbs indicating fading, losing, or dilapidation, creates the sense of “a profusion of exquisite blossoms once lovely now rotting in weeds.”
A tree/flower loses its petals/leaves. Or they fall off so you could stay 'the leaves of the lotus blossom have fallen off'. I don't think you need 'simply' and 'directly' together. Just one of these words will work. 'When he had written it' - I would use the poet's name here since it's the first time you mention the writer. This is really well-written with only a few small errors in phrase and punctuation. Be careful about whether you put full-stops and question marks inside the quotation marks or outside. Well done.
2023年9月11日
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Jan
語学スキル
中国語 (普通話), 英語
言語学習
中国語 (普通話), 英語
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