Hi Kharthick,
Your recording is quite good. You should practice your TH sound a little, like Guy said.
And then, work on the general intonation of the sentences.
To do that, you should take a small recording with a transcript and try to imitate the ups and downs of the speaker inside a sentence.
There are many nice recordings with transcripts over at Lingq ---> https://www.lingq.com/it/
A great exercise is to practice reading together with the speaker, at the same time . At first it is hard, you wll be slower but usually after the 5th time, you are fast enough and you can imitate the intonation as well.
This technique is called shadowing and it is used by interpreters.
You can find many interesting articles on intonation and accent reduction here http://elenamutonono.com/2016/06/14/exclamatory-intonation/
Hope this helps !
Best of luck for your English !
I didn't know Indians had a British accent (:
@Kharthik, great job !
Keep working on it. With constancy, you will see even more improvement.
Check out the website I suggested, there are many good suggestions !
@Elfin , Thank you so much. Your feedback indeed helps me a lot. I practiced shadowing for some time earlier today after I recorded the one you heard. I recorded this http://vocaroo.com/i/s1D9EdIyZvVV after my shadowing practice. Would you kindly let me know if there is any improvement ? Am I heading the right way?
You may also share any feedback in regards with my language, whatever you feel, I wouldn't mind if that was rude. :)
Thank you so much for your time.