您好Guan 先生, you write very well. I would like to offer a suggestion to you. In the first paragraph you share a lot of information using individual sentences. As a result the information is a little 'choppy' or abrupt. Try re-ordering the information and using connectors such as and / in addition. I'll give you an example:

First we can re-order the information that's related, such as studies/occupation:

1 I am looking for a language exchange partner.

2 I am a graduate student.

3 I once worked in a Chinese periodical office as a reporter.

4 I am good at Chinese.

5 My favourite music star is Lee Hom.

Now we can re-structure the paragraph:

I am looking for a language exchange partner. I am a graduate student, and have worked in a Chinese periodical office as a reporter. Thanks to this / as a result / by virtue of this I am good at Chinese. My favourite music star is Lee Hom.

Hope that helps! 再见

First notebook entry: Introducing myself

I am looking for a language exchange partner. I am a graduate student. My favourite music star singer is Lee Hom. I am good at Chinese. I once worked in a Chinese periodical office as a reporter.

I will make a schedule for my partner to improve my English. I will teach him the Chinese express that be in great need important Chinese expressions. I am very thole tolerable (?).

I am doing scientific research work in Beijing Jiaotong university, besides, I am also a media officer in a ENGO named CYCAN.

Thank you.