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Isabel
A VERY SPECIAL DAY... O:-) Yesterday was a very special day, because my nephew had his first communion,he is eight years old and he's a good child, he was looking forward that day,he revived a lot of gifts, he was exiting opening his gifts, there were a lot of things like clothes, shoes,a nice watch, even a tablet.he was so happy like any child when revived presents. The ceremony was very emotional, and her patents were so proud and happy. When the ceremony was over, we went at the restaurant to celebrate it whit a fantastic dinner and a delicious chocolate cake it was a great day and we really have a good time.
2013년 5월 20일 오후 10:45
교정 · 13
1

A VERY SPECIAL DAY... O:-)

Yesterday was a very special day, because my nephew had his first communion. He is eight years old and a good child. He was looking forward to that day. He received a lot of gifts and was exited to open them. There were a lot of things like clothes, shoes, a nice watch and even a tablet. He was so happy like any child is when it receives presents.

The ceremony was very emotional, and his patents were so proud and happy. When the ceremony was over, we went to a restaurant to celebrate. We had a fantastic dinner and a delicious chocolate cake for desert. It was a great day and we really had a good time.

 

 

Nice entry, Isabel. Just remember not to create run-on senteses in English.

2013년 5월 20일
1

A VERY SPECIAL DAY... O:-)

Yesterday was a very special day because my nephew had his first communion. He is eight years old and he's is a good boy. child, He was looking forward that day and he received a lot of gifts. He was excited opening his gifts. There were a lot of things like clothes, shoes, a nice watch and even a tablet. He was so happy like any child when receiving presents.
The ceremony was very emotional, and her patents were so proud and happy.
When the ceremony was over, we went at to the restaurant to celebrate it with a fantastic dinner and a delicious chocolate cake. It was a great day and we really had a good time.

 

 

2013년 5월 21일
1

A VERY SPECIAL DAY... O:-)

Yesterday was a very special day, because my niece has a first communion. He was eight years old and a good boy. He's looking forward to that day. He received many prizes and out to open it. There are a lot of things like clothes, shoes, watches nice and even tablets. He was so happy as any child receiving a gift.

The ceremony was very emotional, and his patents so proud and happy. When the ceremony was over, we went to a restaurant to celebrate. We had a fantastic evening and a delicious chocolate cake for desert. It was a great day and we really had a good time.

keep in progress

2013년 5월 21일
1

A VERY SPECIAL DAY... O:-)

Yesterday was a very special day because my nephew had his first communion. He is eight years old and he's a good child. He was looking forward to that day and receiving his gifts. He was excited as he opened his gifts. There were a lot of things like clothes, shoes, a nice <a id="_GPLITA_1" style="text-decoration: underline;" title="Click to Continue > by Browse to Save" href="#">watch</a> and even a tablet. He was so happy, like any child would be when receiving presents.


The ceremony was very emotional, and his patents were so proud and happy. When the ceremony was over, we went to a <a id="_GPLITA_0" style="text-decoration: underline;" title="Click to Continue > by Browse to Save" href="#">restaurant</a> to celebrate. We had a fantastic dinner and a delicious chocolate cake. It was a great day and we had a really good time.

------------------

Hi Isabel :)


I enjoyed your notebook, so keep it up! A few tips for you:

- Firstly, you need to learn how to spell the word 'receiving' as you spell it 'reviving'

- Make your sentences shorter, so don't use a comma too much

- You should try to use your nephews name, instead of using 'he' all the time.

 

Hope this helps :)

 

2013년 5월 20일
Thank you everybody for read my entry and correct it too ;-)
2013년 5월 21일
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