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are you into soccer? I am not into soccer nowadays but there was a time where I used to love soccer even I was playing it most of the time by that then, I think I got bored, I am not enjoy anything but when it comes to the world cup it is different, I love the passion who this competition creates all over the world, I am wondering how much money the top soccer players are able to make, I guess plenty of money, maybe it wouldn't hurt to watch a few games after all, maybe I start digging the sport again as before
2014년 12월 17일 오후 2:44
교정 · 1
1

Corrections below 

 

Are you into soccer?

I am not into soccer nowadays, but there was a time where I used to love soccer. I was playing it so much that I think I got bored. I don't enjoy it anymore, but when it comes to the world cup, it's different. I love the passion that this competition creates all over the world. I am wondering how much money the top soccer players are able to make. I guess plenty of money. Maybe it wouldn't hurt to watch a few games after all, and maybe I'll start digging into the sport again.

 

1) If you use the word "but", typically a comma precedes the word.

2) Watch "run on sentences." If you are taking a breath while reading, there should be a comma or a period where you paused to breathe.

3) You used commas where a lot of periods should go, which contributed to the appearance of run on sentences.

 

2014년 12월 20일
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