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Tien
IELTS writing essay
Topic:
Even though globalization affects the world’s economies in a very positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.
My essay:
The effect of globalization is a topic that the press is never tired of writing about. Its advantages are praised, but on the other hand its shortcomings are also criticized.
We must acknowledge that globalization has increased sharply trades between countries, continents and thus has boosted the world’s economies. It has rendered more effective the distribution of goods. Each product can be produced cheaper in places where the required resources are abundant, and can be brought to customers far away at a greatly reduced price. It has improved quality of life in most countries. People’s purchasing power hasn’t stopped to increase since globalization showed its first sign. Thirty years ago a colour television costed a fortune, but now most people can afford to buy several of those.
On the other hand, many people believe that globalization has contributed tremendously to the growing inequality in the world. Globalization has given wings to giant, multinational companies to spread their controls and powers without border. It’s very difficult for small local businesses to compete against them since they do not have the financial capacity. Thus, multinational corporations only get richer, and the poor people are left with less opportunities to improve their lives.
In my opinion, globalization is an inevitable movement connecting the world. It doesn’t only stimulate the world’s economies, but also helps sharing ideas and advancing education, technologies. However, its negative sides shall be contained by governmental policies in order to shrink the enlarging gap between the rich and the poor. Only then our next generations can fully embrace the potentials of globalization.
2017년 1월 7일 오후 10:03
교정 · 3
1
IELTS writing essay
Topic:Even though globalization affects the world’s economies in a very positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.
My essay:
The effect of globalization is a topic that the press is never tired of writing about. Its advantages are praised, but on the other hand its shortcomings are also criticized.
We must acknowledge that globalization has sharply increased trading between countries, continents and thus has boosted the world’s economies. It has rendered more effective the distribution of goods. Each product can be produced cheaper in places where the required resources are abundant, and can be brought to customers far away at a greatly reduced price. It has improved the quality of life in most countries. People’s purchasing power hasn’t stopped to increase growing since globalization began showed its first sign. Thirty years ago a colour television costed a fortune, but now most people can afford to buy several of them.
On the other hand, many people believe that globalization has contributed tremendously to the growing inequality in the world. Globalization has given wings to giant, multinational companies to spread their controls and powers without borders. It’s very difficult for small local businesses to compete against them since they do not have the financial capacity. Thus, multinational corporations only get richer, and the poor people are left with less opportunities to improve their lives.
In my opinion, globalization is an inevitable movement connecting the world. It doesn’t only stimulate the world’s economies, but also helps sharing ideas and advancing education and technologies. However, its negative sides should be contained by governmental policies in order to shrink the enlarging growing gap between the rich and the poor. Only then can the next generations can fully embrace the potentials of globalization.
Here are some suggestions for new phrases you can use:
On the other hand = conversely, on the contrary
Thus = therefore
2017년 1월 7일
Good attempt Tien!
2018년 4월 14일
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Tien
언어 구사 능력
영어, 프랑스어, 일본어, 룩셈부르크어, 베트남어
학습 언어
일본어
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