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Lirica
Please point out my mistakes in this sentence and how to rewrite it making it better to understand and more logical?

Initially, never should we ignore the fact that doing internship provide a superb opportunity of getting a great chance to gain some work experiences,especially for students,who haven’t done a lot practical works in this society.Therefore,having a intership job before they offically graduated from college will be beneficial for their future career,during intership,they’re able to find out their motivations,learn some social skills and acquire various of work experiences which will help them gain a clear orientation of their future career.

2018년 6월 23일 오전 6:10
답변 · 2
1
My revision: "From the get-go, we should never ignore the fact that doing internships provides an amazing opportunity for people to gain work experience -- especially students who haven’t done much practical work in society before. Having an internship job before you've officially graduated from college can be greatly beneficial for one's future career path. During an internship, students are able to find out what motivates them, learn some vital social skills, and acquire tons of work experience which will help them gain a clearer orientation of their career path."
2018년 6월 23일
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