I Am a Nurse Last August 23, 2012, I went to another town where my school in college was located. I was walking to the Business and Finance office when suddenly, I received a text message. I almost fainted upon reading it. I sat on a chair and read the message again. It was the message that I have been waiting for months already. It says that the result of the Nursing Licensure Examination, which I took last June 30 and July 1, is already released. It was said that out of 60,895, only 27,823 made it. I was so worried and nervous. I was thinking whether I belong to those who passed or to those who failed. My heart was beating like a drum and my hands were as cold as ice. I called my friend who sent the message and asked her if she passed, she said yes. My nervousness doubled. I asked her if she could look for my name on the list of successful takers. I was patiently waiting when suddenly she shouted and said that my name was on the list. After hearing it, I jumped, laughed, and thanked God for such a wonderful and life-changing blessing. My heart was filled with overflowing joy and relief at that time. Until now, I still can't fathom the thought that I am now a certified registered nurse here in the Philippines. Indeed, God will grant what your heart desires if you just believe. For everyone, keep the faith! :)))

In time Families are there to support you in every step of your journey. Family members should guide you and be at your side through the bad and good times of your life. There is no doubt that I love my family so much. We are a happy family with a close relationship to one another. My family, which I'm referring to, does not just compose my father, mother, and siblings. The members of my family also include my grandparents, my aunts and uncles, as well as my cousins. Yes, we are an extended type of family. I am happy to have this type of family because each member would always be there for the other member whose in a difficult situation. Also, we gather and celebrate during special occasions. There is constant communication. We are so close that I consider my cousins as my siblings. However, there are times when I would feel suffocated. I'm like in an enclosed space where I can hardly move and breathe. I feel like they are forcing me to be the person who they want me to be, not who I want to be. In every decision that I make, like choosing a course or a career, I still have to get the 'yes' of everyone before I can pursue with my decision. That goes true to my cousins too. We are already in the modern world, however, my family seems to be stuck in the traditional times wherein the young generations should at all times follow the elderly. It's like an arranged destiny. I want to get out of this shell but it seems like they are pulling me inside it. I want to grow. I want to explore. I want to be in places where I never imagined I could be and do things that I never thought I'm capable of doing. Slowly, I'm able to speak out and tell them what I want for myself. The sad thing is, I can't do it at all times because some of my aunts are so sensitive that doing so means being disrespectful to them. Why can't they understand the uniqueness of a person and widen their perspective of things? What they think is right may not be right for others. I understand that they are doing it for our own good but I also want to take part in building my own life. :/ Am I a bad person for feeling this way? I just want to be truly happy and contented with my life. I believe that if you don't love what you're doing, you will never be completely happy. And if you're not completely happy, you will never be contented. I know that this is partly my fault, so I will strive hard to be on my own path without hurting them. However, I do not know how. In time, I know I can figure out how.

Buongiorno! Mi chiamo Zuzette. :)) Buongiorno! Mi chiamo Zuzette. :)) These are the first few Italian words I learned while watching videos on Italian lessons online. I am so happy to take the first step in learning this language. I really hope that I will be able to learn successfully. For those who are willing to help me in this journey, send me a message por favore. Learning something new is indeed difficult. However, if the change is for the better or for the improvement of one's self, be willing to embrace the change. Don't be in a rush, for this might make learning more difficult. Take one step at a time. Be patient. For those who succeed are those who are persistent enough to achieve what they want to achieve. Grazie for reading my notebook. Ciao! :))))))

Feeling Bored and Anxious It has been a month and 11 days after I took the Nursing Licensure Examination here in the Philippines. Since that time, I've been living a life filled with boredom and anxiety. Two different emotions yet they both share a space in my heart right now. I am bored because I did nothing other than eat, sleep, watch movies, and surf the internet. I want to do something productive, something other than these routine activities. However, I am anxious because the results are soon to be released. I don't know if I passed the exam. My mind is preoccupied by what ifs. The biggest question running in my mind is, "What if I fail?". I really do not know how to handle that possible situation. Just thinking about it makes me feel like there are butterflies in my stomach. Despite these emotions that I feel, I have to be optimistic. I want to be a nurse. At this time, I just have to pray and believe.

I Will Make it Happen Since I started college, it has been my dream to go abroad, either to work or to study. I want to widen my horizon, meet new people, and see different places. I envision myself working abroad while saving so that I can later on study there. Thinking of this dream really puts a smile on my face. Achieving this would indeed make me very happy. Sad to say, it seems very difficult to achieve. There are a lot of things that serve as a barrier. Financial constraints and others. Indeed, dreams have the capacity to motivate a person to strive hard. Though this may be difficult, I will find a way to make it happen. Good luck to me! :)))

We are what we want to be. Some say that the evolution of a person is a result of one’s experiences in life. He might be tough because life has given him tough challenges while growing up. He might be insensitive because he had received countless harsh comments and cruelty, enough to act as an anesthesia to numb one’s heart. This might be true; however, I believe that we can somehow choose who and what we want to be. For me, our experiences serve only as our guide towards the right action and the right destination. It contributes to our partial, not absolute formation. We may commit mistakes for us to know what is right. After that certain experience, it is still us who decides: whether to do the right thing or re-experience the wrong thing. Perhaps, our decision would also depend on our perception of what is wrong and what is right.

First notebook entry: Introducing myself Good day! I am Zuzette. I want to improve my skill in speaking in English because I am not that good at it and sometimes when I converse with people using this language, my tongue seems to get twisted.