Khaled Bassam
Could someone help me by correcting this short paragraph? [  ] In my city, in the past, people built separate houses. The soil type is clay. That means the lands are agricultural lands. Some people have complained about building houses on agricultural lands saying it denies farmers from using these lands in farming. On the other hand, people who build separate houses say living in an apartment limit their freedom and the space they could exploit to make a small garden. Finally, we should put the country interest over our personal interests. In the present, people live in an apartment building because the land prices are high.
Oct 10, 2020 11:03 AM
Corrections · 4
Could someone help me by correcting this short paragraph? [ ] In my city, people used to build houses. The soil is clay. Consequently, the lands are agricultural lands. On one hand, some people have complained about building houses on agricultural lands saying it prevents farmers from using these lands for farming. On the other hand, people who build houses say living in an apartment limits their freedom and the space they could use to make a small garden. Finally, we should put the country’s interests before our own personal interests. Currently, people live in apartment buildings because the land prices are high.
The first sentence you wrote was fine, the changes just make it read better. “That means” isn’t very elegant but works; however, “consequently” sounds nicer By nature, houses are separate from one another that is part of what makes them a house. It seems that the would “separate” is redundant. However, maybe I misunderstood exactly what you meant. “Deny” doesn’t work in this context. You can deny that you said something. You can also have something denied like your rights. Another option for a verb in this context would be “prohibits.” “Exploit” is like use but with a negative connotation meaning that the way you are using someone or something negatively effects it or them, which is why I wouldn’t use it for having a garden because gardens are good! “In the present” doesn’t work at all, rather try “currently.” Good job! It is interesting to read about other countries and what is going on there. Thanks for sharing!
October 10, 2020
Could someone help me by correcting this short paragraph? [ ] In my city, in the past, people built separate houses. The soil is made of clay. That means the lands are agricultural lands. Some people have complained about building houses on agricultural lands saying it prevents farmers from using these lands in farming. On the other hand, people who build separate houses say living in an apartment limits their freedom and the space they could use to make a small garden. Finally, we should put the country's interest over our personal interests. In the present, people live in apartment buildings because the land prices are high.
Overall great construction! Just a few minor verb changes, and also the word "exploit" is usually used in negative situations so I changed it to "use" to sound more natural.
October 10, 2020
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