Day 4. I got a post in my feed with a few photos of my back described as "looking forward to/at my bright future" or sth. I still am. The karma law, as if adopted by the Russian government, doesn't seem to work smoothly: probably, everyone has that one friend or "friend" who doesn't get what's coming to them, no matter good or bad. The question is, are we to decide what one or another person deserves? Who is, then? And it's not about religion, at least the way I see it. This year I've taken a lot of punishment for what I did and didn't do. And although "punishment" tends to be defined as something unpleasant, there were quite a few times I truly savoured mine. And why I prefer this word to, for instance, a more neutral "outcome" is that the punishments I'm talking about were conceived as something to harm me in this or that way. Not by the notorious fate but by people who have seized the right to judge. I've always been quite a judgemental person myself, and a part of me, I suppose, still is, so I'm scarcely going to achieve the Christian humility just at once and for ever, there are going to be some outbreaks of my righteous indignation and attempts to do justice anyway. But just recently I've decided to abandon this responsibility. For if my future is going to be bright or pale, than no others' opposition can prevent it, and it must work the other way round. No my opposition must interfere with others' happiness or grief.
Dec 4, 2020 1:12 PM