Ingrid
IELTS WRITING TASK 1 image at: https://www.ielts-exam.net/academic_writing_samples_task_1/1121/ "The maps show improvements that have been made to a university campus between 2010 and the present day. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant." The map ilustrates the development of a university campus between 2010 and now. With one 6 floors and other 4 fours student accommodation buildings in 2010 and three buildings with 6 floors housing students nowadays, it is possible to notice from that the amont of scholars increased. Although that is not the only prove of growth from the university. Another exaple is the separation of the Arts and Science Teaching Block from 2010 into two different and taller buildings. Sadly, the development brought an end to the Lawn and seating area around the lake and the restaurant. Despite the fact that currently exists a student facilities building with shops, offices and more, it's unclear whether it includes a restaurant. Furthermore, it, for sure, does not include the peacefullness and bliss provided by nature.
Feb 17, 2021 2:14 PM
Corrections · 1
IELTS WRITING TASK 1 image at: https://www.ielts-exam.net/academic_writing_samples_task_1/1121/ "The maps show improvements that have been made to a university campus between 2010 and the present day. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant." The map illustrates the development of a university campus between 2010 and now. With one 6 floor and another 4 floor student accommodation buildings in 2010, and three buildings with 6 floors housing students nowadays, it is noticeable that the amount of scholars has increased. Although that is not the only proof of growth at the university. Another example is the separation of the Arts and Science Teaching Block from 2010 into two different and taller buildings. Sadly, the development has brought an end to the lawn and seating area around the lake and the restaurant. Despite the fact that there currently exists a student facilities building with shops, offices and more, it's unclear whether it includes a restaurant. Furthermore, it, for sure, does not include the peacefulness and bliss provided by nature. (This last sentence is not really relevant)
There are some good parts here 'brought to an end' 'despite ... it's unclear' 'the separation of ... into two different...' You need a paragraph that gives a clear overview. You say that there are more students and the university has grown, which is good, but this would be better in a separate paragraph (like in the model answer in your link) In a map question it is good to include some direction words: north, south, northeast etc. Another way of writing this type of question is to write about the 2010 map in one paragraph, then write about the current one and the changes. A good attempt, keep writing!
February 17, 2021
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