Khaled Bassam
Could someone help me with correcting this paragraph, please? In my country, the parliamentary elections are close. There are many cities divided on the inside based on clans. People might not have much choice for whom they could vote if one of their clan stands for elections. Youth refuse that kind of practices and say that violates democratic principles. People here, especially who are old, might get mad at you if you're not aligned with their will. Youth want to change the whole system but it needs time to separate people from clan's traditions and convincing them what's better-off.
Oct 9, 2020 10:10 AM
Corrections · 2
Could someone help me with correcting this paragraph, please? In my country, parliamentary elections are close. Many cities are divided based on clans. People might not have much choice for whom they could vote if one of their clan is running for office. Youth refuse to participate in those kind of practices and say it violates democratic principles. People here, especially who are old, might get mad at you if you do not agree with them. Youth want to change the whole system, but it takes time for people to separate themselves from their clan's traditions and convince them this is better.
“There are” does not add information eliminating it improves the sentence. When you say “stands for election, I assume you mean they are running for office or are up for election. “Aligned with their will” sounds unnatural in English. Good job! Very interesting! Thanks for sharing!
October 9, 2020
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