Willow
I found it's hard for Chinese to make friends with foreigners when I'm already living abroad.

I have been in United Kingdom for 2 months.I still have no foreign friends(I mean English friends).Some of Chinese always stay together speaking Chinese all the time,I think this would keep away themselves from other people.I try to speak English as much as I can.But it didn't work.I am sad about this.

Nov 15, 2015 9:40 PM
Comments · 17

Great discussion.

 

First,  get in a situation where everybody is a beginner and learning a hobby.

 

Clubs like learning taekwondo, karate, rock climbing are really good. They force you to listen to the instructor and you get to meet different people who are also beginners in that activity. Try really hard to be the first volunteer - it's hard but once you do it, people will recognize you more and more easily. You have nothing to lose by being the first beginner. Look at people as being friends and not just opportunities to practice English. Make friends first and the opportunities for speaking English will naturally follow. 

 

Talk with overseas born Chinese - they can often explain culture differences better. If you can laugh at yourself and tell funny stories about mistakes you made, you can make friends really easily. Remember to laugh and smile and you will attract friends.

 

When you are at a University event, go early and volunteer to help - even suggest something you can help with - don't wait to be told what to do. People will be friendlier and remember you.

 

Stay in the background and thinking friends will come to you won't work.

 

I remember a Taiwanese girl who came to the University next to mine. Somehow she joined our group of friends, hung out with us, would laugh with us and talk English to us because we couldn't speak Mandarin! When we cooked together or went out, we would ask her to come because she laughed with us. Her English got pretty good! She said she didn't want to hang out with other Chinese from Taiwan or China as she said they were boring!!

 

Unfortunately I wasn't interested in learning Mandarin then so it was a

wasted opportunity for me.

 

 

 

 

November 16, 2015

pleeeease please dont be those kind of chinese people who stay in their chinese social group.

I'm a german born chinese (now in university) and I have both chinese friends who were born here like me and those who come from china. the one thing i noticed with "foreign" chinese people is that they are very shy in social situations and are afraid of making contact to other people from other ethnicities. But thats ok!

I assume you are in university so there are always other foreigners from other countries. Russians, Brazilians, other Europeans etc. They are all new to the place and likely to have language difficulties, too. Stick with them! More social contacts will lead to even more social contacts and soon you will find yourself among lots of friends and the language problem will go away itself. Dont restrict yourself to your own culture!

November 15, 2015

Last bit of advice I forgot to mention.

 

After an activity like rock climbing, some people will go to the bar for a drink. Even if a bar is not your style, go and have a small drink of alcohol to be sociable. You don't have to drink the same amount alcohol as other people. A small amount (1/2 pint of lager mixed with lemonade) will help you speak English a bit easier. Then afterwards, ask if anybody is walking to your hall and walk back together. I tried a couple of Skype lessons and having some beer at the same time. The tutor was laughing with me when I showed the beer can and it went really well :D I did talk a bit of non-standard Mandarin but at least I was talking more!! I don't do this method all the time though.

 

That's a quick guide to Learner SC's method for making friends. Good luck!!

November 16, 2015

I think it's something natural. If I were abroad I would look for Latino friends. Plus, I bet that you study, work and live with Chinese people so you end up spending your free time with them. I hope you will eventually find someone to practice with. In my opinion, I think that English speakers don't like to talk to foreigners on the Internet, let alone in daily lfe.

November 15, 2015

I have been in England/the United Kingdom for 2 months, but I still have no foreign friends (I mean English friends). Some of the Chinese [students] always stay together, speaking Chinese all the time, which I think this would keeps them away/separates themselves from other people. I try to speak English as much as I can, but it diddoesn't work, and I am sad about this.

 

I have corrected your entry, but do not have any good suggestions for meeting English people, except the usual ones of joining clubs on campus, etc.  There is a perception, I think, that Chinese students are not interested in mixing with others, so the isolation is reinforced as others do not attempt to talk with you.  Just keep on trying to speak to other people in English.

To make matters worse in terms of the language, the distinctive accent in that part of the country is probably a little difficult for a learner, so conversation with local people is not easy.

November 15, 2015
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