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Dear sir!

We could not understand why it will take a long time? İf it is hard for you to take from one bank 100,000 Euros, then try to take 50.000 Euros  from two different banks and begin process at the same time.

 This way, you will take both of them in the near future. İn any case, you will do the same things, I mean process with one bank, so we offer you to do these operations and wait for process with two banks at the same time, thats all.

 We wii have 100.000 Euro limit and then you may search for way to increase it to 150.000 Euro. İt is the best and logical way for both of us, because of your order/buying capacity for each season.

 You should consider it well, now you have a new store and you need this limit to work without any delays and make payments for your shipments which stay inside your limit after 60 days.

 Aside from that, actually our clients' guarantee letter limits change between 100 and 500.000 Euros. So, you will be the first client with limit of 50.000 Euros, thats why we are trying to explain you that it is really very small amount of money for your operation.

 We look forward to hearing your positive reply.



Sep 27, 2016 9:07 AM
Comments · 1

Sorry, but I had to read it a couple of times to get the full meaning. I guess the actual recipient will understand more from context.

As a business email in general, it uses language that is far too simple and personal. Because of this, your tone is sometimes pushy and even slightly aggressive.  If you want a more professional tone (I mean, a style which can be taken much more seriously), then you need to rewrite it fully and shift the whole focus to an impersonal style. I do not know if this means that you need to learn a whole new set of English grammar.

If being understood is your only intention, then go ahead and send it. Fingers crossed.

September 27, 2016
Language Skills
Arabic (Modern Standard), English, Russian, Spanish, Turkish, Ukrainian
Learning Language
Arabic (Modern Standard), Spanish