Suleman
Cooking Experiences turned Sour.

While i'm in no means a regular cook. I sometimes, genuinely feel intrigued to prepare dishes from around the world. The dish in particular, that i came across is a South Korean Dish called "Cheese Buldak". Which is basically super spicy chicken marinated in crushed red pepper flakes, topped with a layer of melted mozzarella cheese. Tastes divine if done right. 


While i replicated the dish bit by bit. I made a grave judgement of error. Spices cultivated in South Asian countries like India, Pakistan and Bangladesh are generally more inflaming in terms of hotness as compared to other countries. (I can say this with complete confidence because my aunt brought Tandoori masala cultivated in Canada, which was way milder as compared to homegrown Tandoori Masala in my country.) Moving on, I used the same amount of red peppers flakes as the demonstrator was using in their own dish as well as the other ingredients required in order to complete the dish. 


Now the groundwork has been laid out. It was finally time to chuck the dish in the oven. After the appointed time needed for the dish to fully cook. I take it out and taste the first bite. It felt like a piece of heaven circulating in my mouth. I, feeling completely ecstatic about my creation, i decided to share it with my family,  After they sunk their teeth in the dish, they had this flabbergasting response, as if the devil himself stuck a hot poker in their mouth. They exclaimed to me, that spices are generally far more hotter in our part of the world and you should have used a moderate amount. I completely disagreed with their reasoning and proclaimed that the dish tastes good. As my tolerance for spice is quite high and the first bite had no effect on me. I carry on eating and after exactly 7 bites, i felt this sensation from my throat all the way down to my stomach as if the flames of hell itself had sprung up inside my body. I took me 3 full bottles of water to finally cool myself down and to realize my mistake in the most painstaking way as possible. Nobody touched the dish after that. And I've yet to give it a second try with a milder approach. 


What are your experiences with cooking experiments that turned for the worst? Share them with me and i shall take great delight and pleasure in reading them.

Note: I wrote this from scratch for the 2nd time, because I, being the natural klutz that i'm accidentally refreshed the page.  

May 14, 2018 1:38 PM
Comments · 13

Thanks for sharing this hilarious experience, Suleman.

I'm not bad at cooking. When I make some delicious food and people pay me compliments on my cooking, I smile and say, '' bon appetit.'' But when my food tastes terrible, I hear complains like it's too greasy,  it's undercooked, it's too salty, etc. Of course, I don't get disappointed and try to defend myself by any means. Some of my responses to the complainers are, '' What would you do if you were hungry and alone in a desert?''  Or ''if you were hungry, you would eat the whole plate.'' :D 

May 16, 2018
Thank you so much. Probably the end result of reading hundreds of books as a child. My brain must have picked up the natural way of describing stories and events. If you have a bad cooking experience. Do share it as well. :) 
May 14, 2018
Suleman, I enjoy your writing. You have a gift for descriptive phrasing. You're a natural storyteller. Well done. 
May 14, 2018

Suleman, you made me laugh and it reminded me of the first time I ever had sushi.  Avocados are grown in South Africa and I just love them!  So when I saw this little green lump of avocado paste next to my sushi I popped it into my mouth.  It was wasabi ... I thought, as you said, that I had a hot poker stuck in my mouth.'   

I would not bore you with the cooking failures I have had. Bleh!

May 16, 2018

Hahaha! Great!  I like this part, "  I carry on eating and after exactly 7 bites, i felt this sensation from my throat all the way down to my stomach as if the flames of hell itself had sprung up inside my body. I took me 3 full bottles of water to finally cool myself down and to realize my mistake in the most painstaking way as possible.

It makes my mouth hot. How can I say ? not mouth watering, it's mouth-firing, moth-flaming. 

When I saw an Indian food(?), tandoori chicken covered with red powder, I expected it was spicy but it wasn't. Because Japanese and Korean red powder is very hot. I really don't like red spicy food. So if I visit you, please cook milder one for me.  

Yes, you are a great storyteller, Suleman my friend.

May 16, 2018
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