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highlighted?

He wanted to thank him and apologize and describe all the things Eli had meant to him over the years, to explain that, as much as he’d
already endured, Adrian didn’t know if he could make it beyond the walls without Eli to guide him.

Can anyone help me with the highlighted?

May 21, 2018 7:21 AM
Comments · 1
Adrian has mistreated Eli in some way and wants to apologize for this and tell Eli how important Eli has been to him. Adrian also wants to explain to Eli that even though Adrian has made it through a lot of trauma so far, he doesn't know if he can make it beyond the walls without Eli helping to guide him there.
May 22, 2018