Don't be upset. seem you get a bit confused.I guess might from some friends after you talk with them. is right?
in fact, we make friends on italki , first, practices language what you want to improved. then if you can get nice friends, that would be nice. also that is what we can gain from italki, do you think so?
Don't think too much , just do what you want, life is nothing for us, but we must take care of ourself ,have a good health and keep happy in our life, try to enjoy it.
Wish you have a good evening and sweet dream!