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Jeff
Loneliness

This poem was written in a long time ago.  Can you tell if this is an original composition in English or translated from a Chinese one?

 

Jagged gorges scaling heaven like dragon claws,

Softened perhaps by misty waterfalls.

Celestial cranes crying in its awe

Only to be shrouded in thunderous roar.

Loneliness of angels or immortals

Who would but themselves remember or recall.

 

Well...  This is an original English poem written with Chinese imagery in mind.  There are two clues.  First of all, the poem rhymes in English.  An extremely  rare case for a translation to reach this level.  Then there are only six lines.  Traditional Chinese poems tend to be grouped in fours.

 

This poem was inspired by Nolan/Noel Quinland's composition of 阿里山 in his music CD Middle Kingdom Vol I

 

Subbtle differences between remember (very only) & recall (noun & verb):

 

1.  When you recall something, you remember it and tell others about it.

2.  "remember" implies "retaining information in one’s memory" as well as "retrieving it from there".

     "recall" implies only "retrieving information already retained in one’s memory".

3.  "remember" = effortlessly in retrieving the memory.  Recall = you need hints to do it because you have forgotten about it.

2012년 8월 4일 오전 1:19
Comments · 44

haha,yes, I thought of that too, well, finaly I was caught by you. :( bad luck.

2012년 8월 12일

Simply Lovely!  The only thing to nitpick is 漫谷.  To me it soungs too much like 曼谷 for Bangkok!

2012년 8월 12일

孤寂

崎峡冲天镇龙爪,

瀑布氤岚软巍峨。

乱鹤群飞吒山采,

雄声落水漫谷遮。

只闻仙人好去处,

谁忆此生寂寂休。

I‘m sorry I can't polish it. It is too hard to make a balance between ancient rhythm and keep the original intention for me! 

What I could do was just make the couple(the first line and the second line in one sentence; I use "," and "。" to show it)read more nice. but I can't make it in the whole poem.

And I according to Mandarine rather than Cantonese :(

 

2012년 8월 12일

yes, i knew "佔", i referred to "独独佔", "独独" is a little ambiguous when it accompanied with "佔", though it derived from "独占".

 

yes, I agree with your opinion with simpilicated characters, too.

 

while this could also make sense about "占领", "占" means divination, ballot used a bamboo prod from a box, the people who demands this divination right always the pwerful ones, that was how I interpreted "占" until I knew "佔".

 

Now I think change forced-occupy into mental-occupy is kind of over-interpreted.

2012년 8월 12일

佔 pronounced in Cantonese is jim3.  See http://www.cantonese.sheik.co.uk/dictionary/characters/1188/

2012년 8월 9일
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Jeff
Language Skills
Chinese (Mandarin), Chinese (Cantonese), Chinese (Other), English
Learning Language
Chinese (Mandarin), Chinese (Cantonese), Chinese (Other)