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Vitaly
funny STUPID QUESTIONS http://www.fluent-english.ru/index.php?section=fun&category=3

  • If it's tourist season, why can't we shoot them?

  • Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny?

  • Why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the indestructible black box?

  • How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

  • In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

  • Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

  • When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right! So why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"

  • Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end you first try?

  • Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

  • Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

  • Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

  • Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
  • Whose idea was it to put an "s" in the word "lisp"?

  • Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

  • Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

  • Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

  • Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?

  • Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks his head out the window?

  • Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?

  • What do you call male ballerinas?

  • If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

  • When your photo is taken for your driver's license, why do they tell you to smile? If you are stopped by the police and asked for your license, are you going to be smiling?

  • Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

  • Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?
  • Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.
  • Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?
  • Why are you in a movie, but you're on TV?
  • If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you?
  • If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?
  • Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?
  • How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
  • Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?
  • Since bread is square, then why is sandwich meat round?
  • If money doesn't grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
  • How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?
  • Can you cry under water?
Oct 18, 2008 5:51 PM
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Vitaly
Language Skills
English, French, Russian
Learning Language
English, French