HYEOKMIN KWON
Are there any grammatical errors in the paragraph?

I'm going to describe a modern building in Seoul. It's called the 63 Tower, and it's the tallest building in the city, with about 63 floors.


Although it's called the 63 Tower, most people know this building as offices. In fact, the half of the tower is the office for different kinds of business and the other is enjoyable places for everyone, such as an aquarium, art galleries and an observation deck. The offices' rental fees are expensive because the location and views make them very desirable.


I'm not sure if I like the design of the building, it's just a huge glass emitting orange color tower, but it definitely stands out. It has become a famous landmark in the city. You can see it as you approach Seoul, and it's an easy place to meet people because it's so distinctive and easy to find.

The most interesting thing about the 63 Tower is that there is a restaurant on the 58th floor which has spectacular views of the city; it's definitely the best vantage point in Seoul because there are no walls, only huge windows, so you can look out over the city in any direction. I'd recommend anyone who visits Seoul to go there and experience the view.

Aug 2, 2014 4:46 AM
Comments · 2

Heres my revised version:

Although it's called the 63 Tower, most people know this building as offices. In fact, half of the tower is made up of the offices of different businesses. The other half are recreational areas. There is an aquarium, art galleries and an observation deck. The offices' rental fees are expensive because of the location and the views make them very desirable.

I'm not sure if I like the design of the building, it's just a huge glass emitting orange color tower, but it definitely stands out. It has become a famous landmark in the city. You can see it as you approach Seoul, and it's an easy place to meet people because it's so distinctive and easy to find.
The most interesting thing about the 63 Tower is that there is a restaurant on the 58th floor which has spectacular views of the city; it's definitely the best vantage point in Seoul because there are no walls, only huge windows, so you can look out over the city in any direction. I'd recommend anyone who visits Seoul to go there and experience the view.

 

The second paragraph is excellent! Just a few errors in the first paragraph. Careful not to make your sentances too long :-)

August 2, 2014

Thanks a lot!

August 2, 2014