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Della
The thing which moved you best in your life

When i was young, i was willful. One time, i have a quarrel with my mother. I ran out without taking an umbrellar. It is heavy rain. My father took an umbrellar and followed me. Finally, he gave me the only one umbrellar and was exposed in the rain, and then came back home.

Jan 19, 2015 2:43 PM
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I was very willful when I was young. One time, I had a quarrel with my mother and I ran out without taking an umbrellar. It was raining very hard. My father grabbed an umbrella and followed me. When he caught up to me, he gave me the only umbrella and ran back home in the rain.

 

Comments: The first sentence is almost too short be broken into two pieces like you did.  The second and third sentence sounds better with the 'and' to connect them because you ran out because of the quarrel with your mother.  Because the story is obviously past tense (because it happened when you were young), each verb needs to be past tense (had vs. have, was vs. is).

January 27, 2015

棒棒哒,给他们32个赞,也给你32个赞。

January 20, 2015

上公共汽车的时候。老年人也上车但是突然好多中国朋友站起来帮组那个老年人坐下。好棒。

January 19, 2015
Della
Language Skills
Chinese (Mandarin), English, French
Learning Language
English, French