How to politely ask people not to bring sweets with them when they visit especially if you have a diabetic at home?
People in my society love food gifts and mostly sweets; while this might not sound like a big problem but I see it as a huge dilemma when we have diebetics at home. Some diabetics crave sweets and can't hold themselves if they see sweets in front of them and eventually this way they'll hurt themselves. I thought of many ways and I didn't find a better way than to stop bringing sweets home. I can control that until someone come to visit! So is there a polite way to tell people to stop bringing sweets with them when they visit?
@Aegis: why don't you tell me what you really think? ;)
When I ask a question in a forum, it's certainly not because I want people's opinions about what's suitable in Jordan, but because human beings share the same problems sometimes, so believe it or not; an American could share a lot with a Jordanian and give a suitable advice that might actually works.
When you asked people about certain kinds of diets you're trying lately in your discussions, you didn't really require an answers from Americans only, right?
Diabetes specially type A comes mostly from eating too much sweets, so when the diabetic eats so much sugar, it's because they crave it and not because they want to please friends or family, so the best solution in this case is not to leave any sweets in front of them until they get used to a healthier lifestyle specially that I'm talking about a new diabetic who is over 60 years old and some people in this age find it really hard to change their eating habits all at once. No body is forced to eat a food gift, this is not a 'culture', this is a 'choice'. I have a feeling you didn't read my discussion and just looked at it briefly before you write, but thank you for your comment anyway.
Regarding my friend Chinafan; you actually disappointed me Aegis! I only hope your Russian friends who correct for you are kind and mature, after all we're in a language learning website and if anything is acceptable, then it must be language mistakes. English is not Chinafan's mother tongue, same as it's not mine and it's not really a big deal that we make mistakes. You're always welcome to my discussions but please be kind to my friends.
I'm giving a lot of consideration to you in my comment because I know you have been through a lot lately with your diets and digesting system which probably affected your mood and I really hope you feel better soon.
@Aegis: Indeed it’s a huge problem and I assure you that I admit it, but in order to solve it, the only way that worked so far is that diabetics don’t see sweets in front of them because they won’t have cravings this way. This is only a temporary solution until the new diabetic gets used to it and the desire wanes, because it’s hard after 50 years of eating what they want to control those cravings easily.
I only wish it was me Aegis because I would have taken a full responsibility, but I’m not even into sweets that much; I’m talking about some people I care about and obviously they’re different. It doesn’t work to sound superior and give lectures just because I don’t like sweets, the way I see it, craving sweets this much is like an addiction and this is why I started this discussion.
I’m not saying don’t give your opinion, on the contrary! But we don’t usually call old people fools!
I don’t know if this is the American way to say the truth but I doubt it! Everyone here managed to give their opinion or their advice without being harsh or judgmental!
While I know you’re a man who cares for his health and you got everything under control, but not everyone else is like you and unless you get off your high horse, you would only sound like someone who is showing superiority; good for you to be a superman, but you need a little compassion and to be less judgmental.
Any correction is much appreciated indeed, but since I correct notes for Arabic learners on a daily basis, I don’t remember that I ever said to any learner that they’re rude! People make mistakes and if you really care for their language to be better, you need to be more encouraging. It’s a good thing that I had the kindest people to correct my English notes here, otherwise I would have doubted myself and stopped writing at all.
@Mumtaz - In your original post, you specifically asked what you can do in your situation. I pointed out that it's impossible for people to help you without being familiar with your culture. Not many people drop in and give eachother sweets on a regular basis around here, for example. I thought my point was perfectly valid. But looking at the responses and how you've handled them, it's clear that it doesn't matter if we are familiar with your culture.
Let's be honest, you need a wake up call. You aparently live in a household where diabetics give into their cravings to eat sweets, and you act as if it's inevitable. Well it isn't inevitable. You, the diabetics, and your other household members need to take responsibility and stop this inexcusable behavior. Please look over your answers here and see the great effort you are going through to avoid responsibility.
It's very common that when people disagree on the internet they claim the other person didn't read their posts. You yourself said that diabetics will often eat sweets and then take medicine, rather than just behave properly. Unfortunately this behaviour can make sugar craving worse. Again, please take responsibility and do something about this.
Chinafan suggested that you say something rude. Would you rather I didn't correct it? If you read my post again, you'll see I wasn't offensive to him at all. And especially since he claims to be C2 in English, I think he will appreciate the correction.
I'm being abrupt because it's required, not because of my diet, but thanks for your concern.
Thank you all for your opinions, they’re very much appreciated. Actually after I wrote my discussion, I felt as if I'm looking for a magical solution to end the problem without going through those awkward moments where I ask people to stop bringing sweets.
@Kevin: I only wish it’s that easy with diabetics! While I agree with you completely that they must resist the temptations of the sweets they like, diabetics especially old people are not easy to deal with their minds are fixed. I mean I dealt with kids who had diabetes and they were easier and had their sugar under control ;) Most of our visitors are family and close friends.
@Rahiil: Welcome back my dear :) If it was in my hand, I would never wish that they bring anything ;) It’s enough that they accept our invitation and have lunch with us. Sometimes when I visit friends who have kids, I bring things like books for the kids and colors or even certain kind of clay that they could play with.
@Chinafan: Do you think I never tried that my friend? I already said it twice to 2 different people and with a big smile (,”) Next time they came, they brought fruit baskets and different kinds of nuts and coffee beans which is good except that some kind of fruits like grapes and mangos are disastrous to diabetics!
It is because of my straight and truth-telling character but I would just say it straight but still friendly: "Thank you very much for this very nice present but I am a diabetic/have a diabetic person at home, so next time you want to give me a present, it better be no sweets." While saying this sentence you just smile to the person at the same time and shortly after that sentence and thats it. Anybody would understand this, especially if they didn't knew this before.